Returning
by Lena86
Summary: Sequel to my story Master and Commander. Set during The End of Time. Ten/Rose. Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note: This is the sequel to my other fic, _Master and Commander (_.net/s/6593585/1/). In order to understand this, that one should be read first. Also, I've rejigged some of the episode to fit the story - hope it works!  
_

* * *

It had been one of those days, the Doctor mused as he hurried down the corridor, anxious to move as quickly as possible without alerting anyone to his presence. Still… at least he'd found out why Queen Elizabeth the first hadn't taken a shine to him. Well… as a matter of fact she _had_. At first. He rounded a corner and almost ran straight into Rose. 'There you are!' he said, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice and failing. _Where had she __**been**__?_ 'Come on!'

He grabbed her hand and dragged her after him, back towards the TARDIS. Once they reached it he yanked his key out of his pocket, listening for sounds of pursuit as he fitted it to the lock and opened the door, practically falling through it.

Something was wrong, he knew. He knew before Rose snatched her hand away and disappeared into the recesses of the ship without so much as a by your leave. Not that he expected one, really. But still... _something_ would have been nice.

He sent the TARDIS into the vortex and sighed, running his hands over his face tiredly. He should go and find her.

She was in the infirmary, rooting through one of the drawers with a distracted air about her. He watched from the doorway for a moment, leaning against the frame.

'What are you looking for?' He asked finally.

'Nothing,' she said, sitting down on the cot and running a flannel over her wrist.

She was hurt. She was hurt and he hadn't noticed. He was across the room and standing in front of her inside the skin of a second. 'Let me see.'

'No.'

He looked into her eyes, surprised at the vehemence in her tone. She was furious. 'Rose-'

'Just find me the dermal thingy and leave me alone, Doctor,' she said tiredly.

He found the dermal repair kit and set to work on her wrists, ignoring her protests. Rope burns. These were rope burns.

'There's no point kickin' yourself about it now,' she said.

He didn't look up. Couldn't meet her eyes. Once he'd repaired the skin at her wrists he put the tool down and turned to leave the infirmary.

'You left me,' she said. Her tone wasn't accusatory, just dull. It would have been better if she'd thrown the words at him, had been angry.

He turned, sliding his hands into his pockets. 'No.'

'She wanted to marry you, did you know that? Stupid me, I was in the way. So she was gonna have me executed. I was gonna be beheaded and you disappeared,' her eyes were boring into his now, dark and angry.

'I was working with the counsellors...' he said, the words tasting like ash.

She smiled humourlessly, the expression wrong on her face. 'Right. Course you were. Except... would it have mattered, Doctor?'

'What?' he asked, genuinely puzzled.

'If I hadn't escaped, would it have mattered?' He stared at her, but she wasn't looking at him. 'S'just,' she continued, 'you've barely spoken to me in weeks. And you just disappeared...'

He moved until he was standing in front of her again. 'I'm sorry.'

'Are you?' she looked down at her hands again, twisting the flannel in her fingers.

'Rose... These last few weeks...' he trailed off, unable to finish. He'd been pushing her away again, he knew. Since the Cassandraic warnings had been delivered to him he'd been so afraid of what was going to happen to him, what that would mean for Rose - for _them_ – that he'd been running. Not just from her, either. Running from the galaxy, hiding in the past, visiting uninhabited planets. Drowning out the prophetic mutterings of the universe, the summons of the Ood with the constant sound of motion.

'You're not gonna tell me, are you?' she asked.

He tilted her head back, meeting her eyes. 'You know I wouldn't leave you.'

She jerked her chin out of his hand, looking back down at her hands. 'Do I? She was a queen, Doctor.'

'So?' he asked, more than a little exasperated now.

'_So_? So I've seen before-'

'Never think that,' he said sharply. 'I wouldn't... I couldn't... Rose,' he sighed, gathered himself so he could speak softly once more. 'Why d'you think I didn't let this happen for so long? This... You and me... It's important, Rose.'

'But-'

He cut her off, tilting her head back and kissing her. She pushed against his chest but he refused to move too far back, instead pressing kisses to every available bit of skin he could find. 'I'm sorry,' he murmured against her forehead.

She looked up at him, her eyes dark, but no longer angry. She was sad. For him. She could see he was hurt, that something was wrong and it hurt her. He heard himself groan as he stepped closer, pulling her towards him, nearly lifting her off the cot in the process.

\/\/

He kept his eyes on her sleeping form as he dressed. When he was satisfied she wouldn't wake for a while, he tiptoed out of the room, carrying his shoes.

No more running. He had to know. Rose deserved to know. Nothing was worth seeing her that hurt. And no amount of running made a real difference, anyway. Everywhere he ran with her it was the same. _He will knock four times. Your song is ending. It is returning._

Time to pay a visit to the Ood. But first… first he had something he needed to do here, before Rose awoke and came looking for him.

\/\/

'That man is dead.' He felt the words leave his mouth forcefully. Knew they were true. The Master was dead. Had died in his arms. Had burned by his hand. Like the others… he clamped down on _that_ line of thought before it had a chance to start.

Taking the hands of the Ood again, he saw Donna's grandfather, Wilfred Mott. He looked worried. Donna!

'Wilfred! Is he all right?' the Doctor demanded. 'What about Donna? Is she safe?'

'We are none of us safe,' the Ood Elder said, 'you should not have delayed. For the lines of convergence are being drawn across the Earth. Even now, the King is in his counting house.'

The Doctor saw images of two people he didn't recognise and said so, impatient to get back to those he did know.

'And there is another,' the Ood continued. 'The most lonely of all. Lost and forgotten.'

'The Master's wife,' the Doctor said. Lucy Saxon was sitting in a cell, looking very alone. Terrified. 'She… she was… it wasn't her fault. She was… the Master, he's a Time Lord, like me.' He sensed their incomprehension and took their hands, sending them images to make them understand. 'The Master took the name of Saxon,' he said quickly, desperate for them to get it. 'He married a human, a woman called Lucy. And he corrupted her.'

'She stood at his side while he conquered the Earth. I reversed everything he'd done so it never even happened. But Lucy Saxon remembered.' He saw Lucy fire her gun at the Master, knew they were seeing it too. 'I have to go!' he said, making as though to rise.

Around him, the Ood's eyes began to glow red as they pulled him back into the circle.

'The Ood have gained this power to see through time. Because time is bleeding. Shapes of things once lost are moving through the veil. And these events from years ago threaten to destroy this future. And the present. And the past.'

'What do you mean?'

'This is what we have seen, Doctor. The darkness heralds only one thing. The end of time itself. Events that have happened are happening now.'

Once more, the Doctor saw the Master in his head, laughing. Saw Lucy in her cell. And something else, in the darkness behind her, something more. Eyes in the dark. Animal eyes.

He stood, pulling himself free of the Ood and running as fast as he could. Back to the TARDIS.

He was a little surprised to see Rose in the console room, sitting on the jumpseat with her feet up on the console. She was reading a book, as though today was just like every other day. It was, for her.

He shouldn't have kept this from her for all this time. Tearing his eyes away from her, he made for the console, sending them to Earth. He had to see it for himself, sense it, before he could speak to her, tell her what he was terrified would happen. _He will knock four times._ That was what the Master _did_, wasn't it?

When they landed he ignored her questions and flung the door open, staring around the London street he'd landed them in. And there it was. The Master was here. Definitely here. And he'd been too busy running to notice. Too busy keeping himself away.

'_We believe everyone in the universe must dream of him now.'_ That was what the Ood had said. _Rose._ He turned on his heel and headed back into the TARDIS, calling to her.

She slid off the jumpseat walking around the room until she was standing between him and the console. 'What?'

'Have you... have you had funny dreams lately? Nightmares? About someone we know?'

She looked at him a moment, wide eyed. 'Is that what this is about? Do they mean something? Doctor-'

'Just... Just answer the question. Please.' He was doing his best to keep his tone level. He closed the door behind him and walked up the ramp until he was standing just in front of her and placed his hands on her shoulders gently.

'The Master,' she said quietly. 'I've been dreaming about the Master.'

'Is he laughing?'

She looked confused, but answered anyway, trusting him more than he deserved. Always more than he deserved. 'No.'

He needed to _see_. 'Can I...?' he began, unsure how to phrase the question. Regardless, she nodded. He raised his fingertips to her face, close enough to her now that he could see she was afraid. They'd not done this. Never this.

Pushing that thought to one side, he closed his eyes and was immediately confronted with the face of the Master. And Rose was right. He wasn't laughing. He was screaming. Sobbing. Terrified. Enraged. Hurt. Insane, yes. Definitely. Without a doubt.

And the Doctor _knew_. He was going to die. The certainty washed over him, seeming to leave nothing but calm in its wake. Everyone had been telling him. It was all over the universe, the words following him everywhere, as the Bad Wolf once had. He choked back the thought, unwilling to allow it to escape into Rose's mind, but he couldn't hide his terror.

Rose's presence surrounded him, reminding him why he didn't do this with her, why it was a bad idea. He should pull back, he knew, distance himself from her. Just as he resolved to do so she reached up and laid her hands over his, gently pulling them away from her face.

'Why didn't you tell me?' he asked, the words coming out on an exhale, making him sound breathless.

'Didn't wanna worry you...' She murmured, still holding his hands.

He saw it then. He was frightening her. Had been for weeks now. Too terrified to stop himself. She'd been frightened half to death and hadn't said a word, lest she worry him. And he'd refused to accept the words of the Ood and all the others. Had thought he could keep running forever. He was going to lose her. No. That wasn't right. She was going to lose him.

'Oh, Rose,' he whispered, his hands freeing themselves from hers and drifting back to her temples, reaching for her mind. He couldn't stop himself, he knew as he pressed his fingertips to her skin and his body against hers that he was going to take this to far, too fast.

He was cold, deadened by the weight of having to stay here, to see this through because it was the _right_ thing to do. Because it was his job and there was no one else. Because it was his responsibility. He needed her heat. Just once more. He felt her reach for him - both physically and mentally - and surrendered. 'I need you.'

\/\/

She watched him carefully as they righted their clothes. Once he'd pulled his suit jacket back on and straightened his shirt, he stepped forwards, drawing her against him and kissing her, softly at first, but then more deeply, tilting her backwards against the console.

'What was all that about? She asked breathlessly when he released her. Half amused, half afraid.

He kissed her again, pulling her against him a little too sharply and stealing what little breath she'd managed to recapture. Then he released her and headed for the doors.

'Back in a minute,' he said, throwing the words over his shoulder as though they were nothing. As he closed the door behind him he heard her start down the ramp. Too late. He raised the sonic screwdriver, aimed it at the TARDIS, and activated it.

He kept his back turned as the TARDIS dematerialised. Once the sound had faded he reached into his pocket, withdrawing what looked like a large watch and strapping it to his wrist. Rose's Vortex manipulator. Good thing he'd never deactivated it, really. Not the _best_ way to travel, he'd be the first to admit, but doable.

\/\/


	2. Chapter 2

'_Rose_.'

She turned. A hologram had appeared next to the console. The Doctor, looking directly at her as though he could really see her.

'I know,' she said dully. 'Emergency program one.'

'This isn't emergency program one,' the hologram of the Doctor said, apparently anticipating her response to his image. 'Haven't had an emergency protocol for sending you away since… well... Deleted it after Canary Wharf. I was sure... I was so very sure, Rose, that if I got you back I'd never be doing this again. I'd never want to. Well... I don't want to, as it happens, but I need to.'

He sighed, reaching up and tugging at his ear, nervously. 'I'm going to die, Rose. Properly die and not regenerate. That's what everyone's been telling me for so long now, and I-' he broke off, raising a hand to rub the back of his head distractedly. He blew out a breath. 'This is harder than I thought. Still... third go at the recording and you'll wake up soon and wonder where I am. The TARDIS has been programmed to take you away from Earth until it's safe. Remember those nice people you liked on Sharra Nine? Well... I _hope_ you liked them, 'cos that's where you're going. When it's safe to for her to travel again, she'll let you know. At that point, the TARDIS'll take you anywhere you want to go. Anywhen. Obviously within safe parameters. No going back in your own timeline and all that.'

She opened her mouth to demand that she be taken to him, but was interrupted by the Doctor himself.

'And not to me. Not to any version of me. I've made sure that's impossible. Properly impossible. I'm sorry Rose. I'm so sorry, but you can't come looking for me. The TARDIS should avoid herself in any case, but... Well... You've seen that's not always possible. Remember the celery?' he asked, trying for levity and failing. He sobered, apparently aware that it wasn't going to work. 'So... to recap: little bit of lying low with the Sharrans, then anywhere you want, barring potential paradoxes.' He appeared to think about this and amended, 'Obvious ones, anyway. Just ask. Out loud, preferably. Not sure how accurate the TARDIS'll be if it's just a thought. And Rose,' he said, his tone softening.

He smiled slightly, the smile that appeared the same one she'd seen on the beach in the parallel Norway. His voice was slightly hoarse when he spoke. 'You already know what I'm going to say.'

'Have a fantastic life,' Rose said, her words running over his and almost drowning out the bitter undertone to his voice.

The hologram faded, leaving Rose staring at the spot it had occupied, seemingly frozen. Abruptly it flickered back to life.

'There are some things that go without saying and _some_ things,' he said, sounding more than a little annoyed with himself. 'Some things that really, definitely, _completely_ need saying.' He swallowed and tugged at his ear nervously before continuing. His mouth quirked up slightly as he spoke, 'So I s'pose, if its my last chance to say it... Rose Tyler...'

He paused, seeming to stare directly at Rose for a moment, though she knew he couldn't see her. She found she was holding her breath, waiting for him to disappear.

'I love you. I really, really do. Since always. For all of my forever. Whatever that means now.' He cleared his throat. 'Just in case it wasn't, you know, obvious.' He nodded once in satisfaction and disappeared again.

Rose realised her mouth was hanging open and closed it with a snap. She wasn't going to cry. Or shout at the TARDIS. That was important. She wouldn't panic. She would make a calm, rational decision based on her years of experience with the doctor, her torchwood training and her ability to improvise. She would make a careful plan.

She stepped forwards, laying her hands on the console in case that would help. 'I know you can understand me,' she said, feeling a bit silly even after all these years. 'I know you understand what's happening. I don't want to go to Sharra Nine. I want to go back to Earth. I want to help the Doctor.'

The time rotor continued to pulse, the TARDIS seemingly right on track.

'_Please_,' Rose whispered. 'You helped me before. I can't just… I can't leave him!' She took a deep breath. 'I'd give anything… I'd _do _anything! Just take me…' she paused. And it seemed the TARDIS stood still suddenly, awaiting her decision. Where should she go? 'Take me to Jack.'

\/\/

Jack heard the commotion in the main room of the hub before he saw it. He rounded the corner and watched as numerous papers flew all over the room.

'Jack!' Gwen called 'What's-'

'Shh!' Jack said as Martha and Mickey cannoned into the back of him. Above the sound of flying paper and the almost gale force wind there was an unmistakable sound. The best sound in the universe.

'The TARDIS!' Martha said, sharing an excited grin with Mickey.

The blue police box in question materialised in the centre of the room. When nothing happened for several minutes, Jack approached, dragging his keychain out of his pocket. As he reached the door and fitted his key to the lock, he laid a hand against the TARDIS. 'She's warm,' he noted, more to himself than anyone else.

He pushed the door inwards, stepping carefully into the TARDIS. The interior was very dimly lit, darker than he ever remembered it being. He heard others enter the ship behind him. Then he was shoved aside as Gwen moved past him, crouching on the floor beside something he hadn't seen.

'It's a girl,' she said, leaning forwards to feel for a pulse. 'Weak pulse. She's burning up, barely breathing.' She looked up at Jack as Martha joined her on the floor, concern flooding her features.

'Who is she?' Gwen asked.

'Rose,' Jack said. 'She's Rose.'

The first thing Rose was aware of was the cold. She was never normally cold. The second thing she was aware of was that her bed seemed to have become uncomfortably narrow. _The Doctor'll be furious_, she thought. Then it came back. The Ood. The hologram. The singing.

'Singing?' she asked aloud, shocked at the rough quality to her voice.

'There was singing?'

Rose's eyes snapped open, fastening on the other woman in the room. Infirmary. Definitely an infirmary. Definitely not on the TARDIS. 'Martha?' she asked.

Martha smiled, a special doctorly smile that tried to tell Rose she was safe while keeping her notes safely tucked away.

'I made it, then?' Rose asked. 'This is Torchwood Three, right?'

'Yes you did, Commander Tyler. And yes it is.'

Rose struggled into a sitting position, catching Martha's pained look as she did so but ignoring it. Jack was striding into the room, closely followed by Mickey and Gwen.

'Captain,' Rose greeted, forcing a smile that seemed halfway genuine.

Jack wasn't fooled. He studied her face intently, as though expecting to be able to read it.

Rose ignored him and greeted the others. Mickey was giving her a wary look. 'Mickey?' she asked.

'Where is he, Rose? Where's the Doctor?'

Martha nudged him in the ribs. Hard. Jack glared briefly before turning his attention back to Rose.

'He's… gone, Mickey.' Rose said, looking down at the thin white sheet that had been laid over her.

'What do you mean _gone_?' Martha asked softly.

Jack, however, was moving quickly across the room, stooping to pull Rose into a hug, crushing her against him. She wrapped her arms around him, tense with the resolution not to cry.

'It's the dreams, isn't it?' Martha asked. 'We all saw him. The Master.'

Rose pulled back from Jack and looked up at him. 'I thought it was just me...'

'Nope, everyone on the planet. Probably throughout the universe,' he said.

'But not the Doctor,' Rose said softly.

'Not us, either,' Gwen said. 'As long as we're down here we're safe.'

'Rose,' Jack said, pulling back from her. 'What's he doing?'

'He's gone to find the Master,' she told him, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. 'He's gone to find him and he sent me away because…' she trailed off, closing her eyes against a sudden wave of dizziness.

'Because he thinks he's gonna die,' Jack finished.

Rose nodded. She took a deep breath and dropped off the bed onto the floor, swaying slightly as she straightened. Martha was looking at her with something approaching alarm in her eyes. 'I need your help,' Rose said, looking up at Jack and then to the others. 'I need Torchwood's help.'

'Rose-' Mickey began, his tone sympathetic.

'He said it was impossible,' she said, ignoring him and keeping her attention on Jack. 'The Doctor said it was impossible, and I thought…'

Jack smiled grimly. 'That we're all _about_ impossible, you and me?' she nodded. 'Plus,' Jack mused, 'you know how I love to prove him wrong.'

'I don't know if I can use the TARDIS,' Rose said. 'She brought me this far against the Doctor's orders.'

'How?' Jack asked, his eyes boring into Rose's.

'Rose…' Mickey said. 'You didn't?'

Rose shook her head. 'Nothing like last time. There was just the light, and the song. But I feel fine,' she added quickly. 'I feel like myself.'

Mickey and Jack regarded her seriously for a moment, but Rose ignored them. 'If you're not gonna help me-'

'C'mon,' Jack said suddenly. 'I'll see what I can do with the old girl.'

\/\/

Hours later, they stood staring up at the central console, frustrated.

'It's like she's burned out,' Jack said. 'She'd need hours to recover, days maybe.' He turned to Rose. 'I'm sorry, Rose.'

'We can't just give up!' Rose said, laying her hands on the console. The dimmed lights flickered briefly and a mournful sound came from the time rotor. In front of Rose, the monitor flickered to life. She stared at the image on the screen.

'It must have taken everything she had to get you here,' Martha said quietly.

'Then we find another way!' Rose said.

'Rose,' Mickey began sympathetically, 'maybe she just meant to get you here, to us. Maybe you're not supposed to-'

'I don't wanna hear it, Mickey,' Rose said, slamming a hand down on the console.

Abruptly, the Doctor's image appeared beside Jack.

'…_things that really, definitely, __**completely**__ need saying_,' the Doctor said. Rose stared at his image, aware that the others were doing the same. _'So I s'pose, if its my last chance to say it... Rose Tyler... I love you. I really, really do. Since always. For all-_'

He was cut of as Jack reached for the console, flicking a switch with an apologetic look at Rose, who kept her eyes on the spot the Doctor's hologram had occupied.

'Oh!' Martha said. She turned and ran out of the TARDIS, leaving the four of them standing there, staring at the console. When she returned, she was clutching a backpack.

Jack looked up and saw what she was carrying. 'No.' he said firmly.

'What is it?' Rose asked as Martha approached her holding out the backpack.

Jack snatched it away before she could hand it to Rose.

'It's a teleport,' Martha said, glaring at Jack. 'Something I picked up while I was working for UNIT. I thought you could use it to get to the Doctor.'

Rose turned to Jack, who was shaking his head. 'No. It only takes one.'

'Jack-'

'Not on your own, Rose. I'm sorry but I can't let you.'

'_Let_ me?' Rose repeated.

'I'm with Jack on this one,' Mickey put in, earning himself a glare from both Martha and Rose.

Rose crossed her arms, glaring at Jack.

Unperturbed, Jack said 'I can make it an order if I have to.'

'I outrank you Captain!' Rose pointed out, her tone sharp.

'Not here you don't,' Jack said calmly. 'I'm sorry Rose, I'd never forgive myself if something happened to you.'

'If something happened to me?' She repeated dully, turning and leaning against the console. 'Have you seen this?' she demanded, shoving the monitor towards him.

Jack stared, feeling Martha, Mickey and Gwen fall into line behind him, all craning to see the screen.

'Jack?' Gwen asked.

'I don't-' he began, staring at the impossible image. The sky above Earth was filled by a large, red planet.

'Do you know what it is?' Rose demanded.

'Rose-'

'It's Gallifrey, Jack! You're worried about somethin' happening to _me_! What about the Doctor? Don't you care?'

'The Doctor can take care of himself,' Mickey said when Jack only stared at Rose, the pack dangling loosely from his hand.

'Let her go,' Martha said quietly. Rose shot her a grateful look.

'Gallifrey's gone, Rose.' Jack said. 'What makes you think… How do you know it's Gallifrey?'

'I don't know, I just saw it on the screen and I just… knew,' she admitted.

He stared at her for another long moment, and then held out the pack to her. 'But I'm coming after you,' he warned, as she took it and slung it over her shoulders. 'I might not be the Doctor but I can definitely get her flying through space again. We always had a good rapport, didn't we?' He asked, running a hand along the console.

Rose nodded and turned to Martha. 'How does it work?'

'Pull that string there,' Martha said, 'and think of where you want to be.'

'Right,' Rose said, she straightened, her mouth set in a determined line. 'I'll see you soon,' she said, looking at Jack. Then she pulled the strings dangling from the shoulder straps of the backpack and disappeared.


	3. Chapter 3

Internal bleeding. The Doctor could feel it, under his ribs. His life, ebbing away. He kept his eyes on the Lord President as he spoke to the Master. 'You weren't there in the final days of the war. You never saw what was born. But if the Time Lock's broken then everything's coming through, not just the Daleks, but the Star of Degradations, the Horde of Travesties, the Nightmare Child.'

The Master's gaze flicked to the Lord President. The other Time Lord was breathing heavily, his eyes on the Doctor.

'The Could-Have-Been-King with his Army of Meanwhiles and Never Weres,' the Doctor continued, his voice bitter. 'The war turning to Hell!' He glared at the Master. 'And that's what you've opened. Right above the Earth. Hell is descending.'

'My kind of world!' the Master said, his eyes gleaming.

He wasn't getting it, the Doctor knew. But he could. Of all of them, he knew he could make the Master understand. If he just had more time. 'Just listen! 'Cos even the Time Lords can't survive that!'

The Lord President spoke, and the Doctor could feel his despair starting to overwhelm him. 'We will initiate the final sanction!' He recognised the President's tone of voice. Had heard it himself, speaking to him from his darkest self, during those moments when his sanity – his morality – hung in the balance. 'The end of time will come at my hand! The rupture will continue until it rips the time vortex apart!'

'That's suicide!' the Master said, finally starting to understand.

'We will ascend!' the President continued. 'To become creatures of consciousness alone. Free of these bodies.' The Doctor looked up at him, seeing his arms spread wide. Ever the orator. 'Free of time and cause and effect. And where creation itself ceases to be!'

No point even speaking to Rassilon. He'd been beyond reason for too long now. The Doctor turned to the Master. 'You see now? That's what they were planning in the final days of the war. I had to stop them!'

The Master's eyes shone with tears. He walked towards the small group of Time Lords, arms spread wide, every inch the supplicant. 'Then… take me with you! Lord President, let me ascend into glory!'

The Doctor knew what Rassilon would say before he said it. The Master could never ascend, would never be accepted. Never had been, really. Neither of them had.

The President sneered at the Master, his disgust evident on his face. 'You are diseased! Albeit a disease of our own making. No more!' He raised his gloved hand aiming it at the Master.

The Doctor raised the gun he'd taken from Wilfred, taking the safety off and aiming the gun at the Lord President, placing himself between the High Council and the Master. Wilfred was watching him from the booth he'd stupidly – selflessly – gotten into, he knew. Watching his actions and seeing him go against everything he'd told the man he stood for. He felt a momentary flash of guilt, hotly followed by relief that none of the others were here to see this. That _Rose_ wasn't here.

Rassilon glared at him. 'Choose your enemy well. We are many. The Master is but one.'

'But he's the President!' the Master said, sounding self-assured once more. 'Kill him and Gallifrey could be yours!'

But he'd had Gallifrey, hadn't he? And he'd run. And that up there, that wasn't his Gallifrey. His Gallifrey didn't belong in this system. No. That planet darkening the Earth's sky had been dragged here by a madman. He turned on his heel, aiming the gun at the Master.

The Master stared at him, panic suffusing his face. 'He's to blame, not me!' The Doctor watched as his mind reached the same conclusion as the Doctor's own. 'Oh! The link is inside my head! Kill me, the link gets broken, they go back.'

The Master held his gaze for a moment, some indefinable emotion showing on his face, as though he was having the same internal argument the Doctor was. 'You never would, you coward.'

'Doctor!'

The Doctor felt his hearts thud against his ribs, almost stilled. He looked over towards the booths and felt them shudder back into life. Rose was standing there, slipping her arms free of some kind of backpack. He stared at her a moment, unable to do think, to speak, to do anything other than simply _look_. His impossible Rose, here at the most impossible time.

Finally, he found his voice. 'You were supposed to be safe!'

'Not much good at keeping her that way, are you?' The Master taunted, although his voice still carried an undercurrent of fear. The Doctor glanced at him, but the other Time Lord's eyes were on Rose.

For her part, Rose didn't acknowledge him. She wasn't looking at either of them. 'I've seen you before,' she said, looking at Rassilon as though trying to work him out. Her gaze travelled over the other Time Lords standing with the Lord President. 'All of you. I know you. Don't ask me how but I do. Why have they got their faces covered like that?' she asked, glancing at the Doctor.

'Abomination!' Rassilon hissed.

The President's voice startled the Doctor out of his reverie. He turned, aiming the gun at Rassilon again.

'So it's true what they say,' Rose said. 'You do turn into what you hate.'

'What?' The Master asked, looking a lot more relaxed now the attention wasn't all on him.

'Him,' Rose nodded towards Rassilon. She sent a glare at the president. 'Last one to call me an abomination was the Emperor of the Daleks.'

The Doctor watched Rassilon's gloved hand twitch and felt his stomach turn over.

The Master, however, laughed. 'Excellent. Commander Tyler, just what we needed to lighten the mood. You don't happen to have brought any hairdressing equipment with you?'

'What have you done?' Rassilon demanded, looking at the Doctor.

'Question isn't what he's done,' Rose said, before he could respond. 'It's what you've done. But I know. I know what you did to both of them. Drove him mad,' she said, jerking her head in the Master's direction. 'Planted the sound of drums in 'is head from when he was a kid. 'Cos you knew he'd run from the time war. Knew he'd survive what happened to bring you back. All of you.'

'Silence!' Rassilon snapped. Behind him, one of the disgraced council members lowered her hands from her face, her eyes meeting the Doctor's as Rassilon continued. 'I will not listen to the mewlings of a child! No matter what attachment the Doctor has-'

'What you did to him was just as bad,' Rose interrupted. 'You made sure he knew he'd die here. He stopped you and you wanted him to pay for it.'

As she spoke, Rose was picking her way across the room, crunching the broken glass under her boots as she reached the Doctor. He glanced down at her and regret burned through him that he couldn't drop the gun and take her hand. That he'd allowed things to progress this far.

'You shouldn't be here, Rose,' he said, defeated. 'I wanted you safe.'

'Is there anywhere safe?' she asked softly. 'If their plan works, is there anywhere safe for me, Doctor?'

He stared at her, before shaking his head. 'I've already killed them all once, Rose,' he said, his tone one of confession. 'I don't know if I can-'

'It's ok.'

'You stupid girl,' the Master hissed. 'Stupid, stupid, human girl! Don't you know what they want to do? What it means?'

She turned her attention to him for the first time. 'I know.' The Doctor's eyes flickered from the President he held at gunpoint down to Rose's face. She looked up at him, her eyes bright with unshed tears. 'And I know you.'

She looked up, directing her gaze out through the broken glass ceiling. 'It's beautiful,' she said quietly.

The Doctor glanced upwards, allowing himself, finally, to look at Gallifrey. He looked back down at Rose, staring at her for a long moment. Then he turned towards the Master, feeling his fingers tighten on the metal of the gun.

The Master's eyes widened, fear showing clearly in their depths.

'Get out of the way,' the Doctor ordered, and fired the gun.

As the machine that forged the link through the time lock exploded into flames, the Doctor dropped the gun to the floor and took Rose's hand, pulling her tight against him and kissing her fiercely before pushing her roughly away, watching as she fell to the deck beside the Master.

The irony of the idea that that was probably the safest place in the room at the moment didn't escape him.

'Back into the time war, Rassilon!' he said, hearing the triumph in his own voice and hating it. 'Back into hell.'

'You die with me, Doctor,' Rassilon snarled.

'I know,' he said, watching as the President raised his gloved hand again.

'You can't keep sending me away!'

The Doctor turned, seeing Rose climbing to her feet, glaring at him. He watched as she turned and pulled the Master to his feet.

'Sound of drums, yeah?' she asked.

'Yes!'

'What can you hear now?'

The Master cocked his head to one side, as though considering. 'Oh!' he said, his voice low. 'Oh that's clever!' He looked over Rose's shoulder at the Doctor. 'Your TARDIS. In my head. Your TARDIS.' Suddenly, his expression changed, fury clouding his features. 'Get out of the way.'

The Doctor turned, knowing what was happening even before he saw Rassilon raise his gloved hand. Flashes of Lucy Saxon, switching targets. Himself and Jack, too slow to stop her firing the gun. And Rose was engulfed in brilliant silver-blue light.

The Doctor stared as the power surrounded her, flowing from both Rassilon and the Master. It snapped off, sending out a shockwave that caused Rassilon to stagger back slightly and knocked the Doctor and the Master to the floor.

Rose lay on the floor, a few feet from both of them. The Doctor watched as she pulled herself into a sitting position. He could feel the pull the link was exerting and if he focused just right he could see it drawing on the golden time traces that surrounded Rose, could watch them flicker. In his peripheral vision he could see the Lord President was powering up his gauntlet again. He couldn't survive that, he knew. Not in his current state.

Rose looked at the master. 'You know what I want. Why I'm here. I told you that you couldn't give me what I want but you can now. Help me.'

'Why should I?' the other Time Lord asked.

'Because they destroyed your life!' Rose retorted. Then her expression softened. 'And for me. For him.'

The Master's eyes widened at that. 'What would you know-' he spat.

'He had to make the decision on his own,' Rose said, her voice sounding stronger now. The Doctor looked at her, saw _something_ flicker in her eyes, a hint of gold.

'Time's champion,' Rose continued. 'The universe lives or dies by his choice. I can see it. All of it. And I can see you. Everything you are, were, will be. I _know_ you, Koschei,' she said, her voice growing more desperate, sounding more like her. 'Please.'

The Master stared at her, his gaze flickering from Rose to the Doctor. Then he pulled himself to his feet, turning to face Rassilon and raising his hands. He moved until he was standing between Rose and the Doctor, his eyes intent on the President.

'For her?' the President asked. 'For the Doctor's pet? His plaything? I thought better of you, Master.'

'Not for his pet,' the Master said, rubbing his hands together. 'For Commander Rose Tyler. And for him.' He fired a bolt of energy at Rassilon.

'Always the Doctor!' Rassilon spat. 'There was something about the way you two were always drawn together...'

'You did this to me!' the Master screamed. 'All of my life!' he threw another bolt of energy and the Doctor saw his skeleton become visible for a moment. 'You made me! One! Two! Three! Four!' the Master punctuated each number with a bolt of energy.

Suddenly, the room was quiet. The High Council were gone. Gallifrey was gone. The Master was gone. Rose was lying on the floor a few feet away from him, unconscious.

'I'm alive,' he said, pulling himself into a kneeling position, feeling his brain trying to assimilate the knowledge. The Master had saved him, had died in his place. 'I'm still alive!'

He wanted to laugh, to scream. His eyes fell on Rose's body. As he was about to crawl over to her he heard it. Four knocks on the inside of the control booth.

\/\/


	4. Chapter 4

Absolute terror gripped the Doctor's mind. Froze it. He'd survived all this for _Wilfred_ to be the reason he died. He'd be able to regenerate from this, true. But he'd really rather it wasn't necessary. He pulled himself to his feet, unable to drag his eyes from Wilf. His friend was standing in the booth giving him a look of such hope, such trust, completely unaware of how much this _hurt_.

He walked towards the control booths with feet that were apparently made of lead, stopping by Rose and pressing his fingers to her throat, checking her pulse. She was only unconscious, her heart beating steadily. A part of him was glad she wasn't awake, wouldn't see what was about to happen. She didn't want this. Couldn't want this. Deserved better. He ran a hand over Rose's hair, then straightened up and looked over at Wilfred.

'They gone then?' Wilf said. 'Yeah, good-o. If you could… er… let me out.'

The Doctor nodded. 'Yeah.' He glanced back down at Rose where she lay at his feet. The part of him that wasn't glad of her unconscious state wanted her to wake up now. Wake up right now and tell him it was ok to leave. To run from this place and never look back. But she wouldn't do that, would she? She wouldn't leave Wilf here to die.

Wilf shifted uncomfortably in the booth and the Doctor realised he hadn't moved for too long. 'I mean, this thing seems to be making a bit of a noise.'

'The Master…' he began, stepping around Rose and towards Wilf. 'The Master left the nuclear bolt running. It's gone into overload.'

'And that's bad, is it?' Wilfred sounded afraid and the Doctor wondered if the man _knew_. Knew that his life depended on the Doctor sacrificing his own, and that the Doctor wasn't sure he could do it.

'No,' he said. ''Cos all the excess radiation gets vented inside there.' He nodded towards the empty booth. 'Vinvocci glass contains it. All 500,000 rads about to flood that thing.'

'Oh. Well, you'd better let me out then,' Wilf said, contriving to sound as though he had no doubt in the Doctor even as his voice wavered slightly.

Maybe he didn't. The Doctor wished he had his friend's faith. He glanced over his shoulder at Rose's unconscious body, seeking reassurance. When he turned back, Wilf was looking at her too.

'What did they do to her?' Wilf asked. 'Is she all right?'

The Doctor swallowed, allowing his eyelids to flutter closed over eyes that were suddenly burning. He couldn't talk about Rose. Not now. 'Wilfred,' he said quietly. 'It's gone critical.' He watched this sink in before continuing, 'Touch one control and its floods.' He reached into his pocket and withdrew his sonic screwdriver, holding it loosely in his hand. 'Even this would set it off.'

'I'm sorry. Look, just leave me.'

The Doctor felt his mouth twist into a horrible grimace of a smile. 'Okay, right then, I will. 'Cos you had to go in there, didn't you? You had to go and get stuck, oh yes!' He sighed and continued in a softer tone. ''Cos that's who you are, Wilfred. You were always this. Waiting for me, all this time.'

'No, really, just leave me. I'm an old man, Doctor. I've had my time.'

Incredibly, the Doctor found he wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness of _that_ particular statement. Hadn't he had this chat with Wilf already? Told the man he was older - so much older – than he would ever be. He found his amusement turning to anger remarkably quickly. 'Well, exactly, look at you. Not remotely important! But me? I could do so much more! So much more! But this is what I get. My reward. _And it's not fair_!'

He reached out and pushed the contents of a desk to the floor, feeling his lungs burn as he tried to draw in enough air. He returned his eyes to Wilfred, standing in the booth and watching him fearfully. Afraid now that he _would_ be saved. But that was who _they_ were, wasn't it? All of them. His friends. Everyone he'd picked to travel with him. Every single one of them was too brave by half. They broke his hearts.

'Live too long…' he murmured, remembering what he'd said to Wilfred earlier. He'd meant it then, too. Although not as much as he did right now. Wilf's life for his was not a fair trade. Would never be a fair trade.

'No. No, no, please!' Wilf begged, frantic now as he realised the Doctor would go through with it, no matter what it would cost him. 'Please don't. No! Don't! Don't! Please. Don't. Please. Doctor, look at her!' he said finally, his eyes flicking desperately from the Time Lord to Rose and back again.

The Doctor came to a stop in front of Wilf, his back resolutely turned towards Rose.

'You can't leave her, not like this! Not for me!' Wilf continued, shaking his head as tears began to track down his cheeks.

The Doctor took a deep breath, steeling himself, and reached for the handle.

'Don't!' Rose's hand closed over his own, pulling it away from the handle and gripping his fingers far too tightly. He looked down at her, finally feeling the tears that were burning his eyes start to fall.

'There,' Wilf said, his voice calmer now. 'Look at the two of you. Leave me here.'

'Don't worry,' Rose said, tearing her gaze from the Doctor's. 'We'll get you out.'

'How?' The Doctor asked softly, his eyes still fixed on her face, drinking her in.

'We'll think of somethin'!' she said, her eyes flashing fury at him for a moment.

'I can't open it Rose. The slightest little thing'll fill that booth with radiation. I have to go in.'

'No! You don't. Didn't you hear what I said before? They planted the premonition, the prophecy... Whatever it was. It doesn't have to be real. Not unless you want it to be!' She hesitated, then said, 'Is that what you want, Doctor?'

'Rose, I'll regenerate. It'll be ok.'

'You said you didn't want to change. You're not ready,' Wilf said. 'You won't be you anymore,' Wilf said. 'That's what you said,' he added, as the Doctor turned his gaze on his friend.

'No,' The Doctor said softly. 'I won't.' To think, only minutes ago he'd been worried about what would happen to Rose. About what was _already_ happening to Rose. There were things in her head that shouldn't be there. The Master's name. Rassilon's face. He didn't want to regenerate. Didn't want to change again, not yet. Nevertheless, he pulled his hand free of Rose's and reached for the handle again.

'Doctor,' Rose pleaded, her voice breaking slightly.

He wanted more than anything to hold her. To just take her and go. So much of his life with her was tainted by sadness and danger and loss. Who would they be hurting if they just ran? If he just took her hand and left this place, this planet? Wilf, obviously. Wilfred Mott. His friend. If the Master could give his life for his greatest enemy, surely he could give his life for a friend. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. 'Three… Two…'

'Doctor!' she said, more urgently this time, pulling at his jacket. 'Just hold on. Please.'

'The booth is destabilising,' he said, fury and terror making his voice dull.

She reached up at turned his face so he was looking down at her, leaving her hand resting against his skin. 'I don't care if you… change,' she said, 'but you do. I know you do. Wait.'

'What's that?' Wilf asked, pressing a finger against the glass and pointing behind them.

The Doctor kept his eyes on Rose as a new sound filled the too-quiet room. The TARDIS was materialising. 'Rose? What are you doing?'

The door opened and Jack stepped out. 'Sorry it took me so long. Lotta weird activity going on today, don't know if you noticed. Kinda hard to lock on to you.' He looked from Rose to the Doctor and back again, taking in the scene. Then his gaze flicked over the booths. 'Radiation overload?' he asked.

The Doctor nodded, still resolutely keeping his eyes on Rose and his hand on the door control.

Jack laid a hand on his arm. 'Why don't you let me get this one?'

Finally, the Doctor looked away from Rose, meeting Jack's eyes. He sucked in a breath, trying to hide the pain it caused him – cracked rib, no, _ribs_ – and blew it out in an effort at sudden nonchalance. 'Oh, all right, go on then.'

As Jack pulled open the door to the booth and stepped inside, releasing Wilf, the Doctor felt Rose grab hold of his jacket and pull him back, away from the booths. As though she thought he might change his mind and rush in regardless.

'But he-' Wilfred began.

'He can't die,' Rose said quietly, her grip on the Doctor's sleeve tightening as Jack cried out in pain.

'He an alien then?' Wilf asked, seemingly desperate to distract himself.

'No,' the Doctor said, sliding his hand into Rose's.

'I did it,' Rose said. 'Made him immortal.'

Wilf was looking at her with unsuppressed wonder now, but neither of them paid him any attention. Jack was dragging himself up the inside of the booth.

'Am I safe?' he asked.

'Safe?' the Doctor repeated.

Jack shot him a dry look. 'Will I kill you all if I come out there?' he asked.

'Oh!' the Doctor said. 'Right. Sorry. Hang on.' With his free hand he reached into his pocket and withdrew his sonic screwdriver, using it to scan the booth. 'Nope. All clear. Not even a little bit radioactive.'

Jack pushed the door experimentally and it swung open. '_Now_ you open,' he said irritably. He looked up at the Doctor and glared. 'You,' he said, levelling a finger at the Time Lord, 'have an immortal friend. Don't waste a regeneration wandering into places like this.' The Doctor bowed his head, looking down at his shoes for a moment. 'You look terrible,' Jack said flatly. 'Shame about the suit.' He turned his attention to Wilf, extending a hand. 'Don't believe we've been introduced. Captain Jack Harkness.'

'Wilfred Mott,' Wilf said, shaking Jack's hand after only the tiniest hesitation.

The Doctor was looking at Rose. Now he had time to think there were really a ridiculous amount of questions buzzing through his brain. He still felt too numb to ask them, though, and she looked utterly exhausted.

'You got the TARDIS fixed then?' Rose asked, looking away from the Doctor and up at Jack.

'You broke the TARDIS?' the Doctor said, alarmed. Behind Rose, Jack was urgently shaking his head. 'You know what?' the Doctor continued, before Rose could speak. 'Never mind. I don't want to know… right now, anyway. Let's go home.'

\/\/

They said goodbye to Wilf outside his house, Rose leaning against the TARDIS while the Doctor spoke to his friend. She was furious, he knew. From the sympathetic looks Wilfred was giving him, he knew too. She stepped forwards and hugged the old man, promising him they wouldn't simply disappear again, then walked back into the TARDIS, leaving the door open for the Doctor to follow.

When he entered the TARDIS she wasn't in the console room. Jack was gone, already back in Cardiff, helping Torchwood spread the word that recent events were down to mass hallucinations caused by… something or other. The Doctor sighed. Clean up. Not his strongpoint. He started the dematerialisation sequence, catching sight of the blood on his hands as he did so. He sat down heavily on the jump seat, staring down at them.

Rose appeared in front of him, startling him slightly. He looked up but she refused to meet his gaze. Instead, she ran her eyes over his hands, taking in the blood and the cuts. 'You're hurt.'

_More than you know_, he thought. Aloud, he said, 'It doesn't matter.' He'd wait until she went to bed then take himself off to the infirmary and patch himself up.

'Come on,' she said, still not meeting his eyes. She took his hand and led him from the console room. He was vaguely surprised when she turned away from the infirmary, heading instead for the bedroom they shared.

She helped him out of his ruined suit jacket and loosened his tie, pulling it over his head before sitting him on the edge of the bed. On the nightstand she had a bowl of water and a cloth. He watched as she methodically soaked the cloth, using it to clean first one hand, then the other.

Then, finally, she looked up, her eyes raking over his face quickly before dropping back to the cloth. She wet it again and rang in out into the bowl before reaching up and running it over his skin. It stung and he was unable to stop himself wincing it the pain.

'Sorry,' she murmured, her eyes dropping to his for a moment. She froze like that, her eyes on his, the cloth held inches from his face. He reached out and took her wrist, exerting gentle pressure there to get her to stop. 'I need to finish this, Doctor,' she protested, but didn't continue, letting the cloth rest against his cheek for a moment. He reached up and mirrored the gesture, resting his hand against her face.

He could have died today. Could have sacrificed his people for the good of the universe and all the reward he would have gotten was to regenerate. To have what he knew as himself die and be replaced. Bit of a strange perspective on regeneration, considering he'd already gone through it nine times, but looking up at Rose, he thought he could see why.

She'd come for him, again. Had stood unafraid in front of the High Council of Time Lords. Had veritably mouthed off at Rassilon. Had left the fate of her world, of the universe, in his hands and stood beside him while he made the decision. And the Master had sacrificed himself to save them both. Because she'd taken his hand and stopped the drumming, filling him with the song of the TARDIS. He should really find out how that had been possible. Should find out how she'd managed to get the TARDIS here when he'd thought it impossible. But here she was. And she'd saved him, partly from Rassilon but mostly from himself. She was at one and the same time his salvation and his reward. His Rose.

She dropped the cloth into the water bowl and straightened up, moving to step back from him. 'Shirt off,' she ordered.

'You're angry with me,' he murmured.

'No,' she said. 'Shirt off, Doctor.'

'Rose-' he began.

'I'm not,' she interrupted, stepping forwards and unbuttoning his shirt. 'You were just tryin' to keep me safe.' She ducked her head so she could meet his eyes. ''m worried about you,' she admitted.

'I'm all right. I'm still me,' he smiled.

She returned his smile with a weak one of her own and he watched as it faded too quickly. Her eyes widened as she pulled his shirt open. He looked down. His torso was covered in bruises. Wordlessly, Rose handed him a scanner she'd brought from the infirmary. He took it and ran it over himself. Three cracked ribs, already on their way to mending, but while he was here… he fiddled with the scanner, wincing as he felt it begin to knit the bone. The bleeding had stopped, not too much damage there.

He handed the scanner back to Rose, who held it for a moment. 'What about those?' she asked, nodding towards the bruises.

'They'll be fine by tomorrow,' he assured her.

'You should get some rest. You look exhausted.'

'Stay with me?' he asked softly, surprising both Rose and himself.

She looked at him, meeting his eyes properly for the first time in what felt like an eternity. 'I thought-'

'What?' he asked quickly.

She looked down at the device in her hands. 'I thought you'd wanna be alone.'

'No,' he said quickly. 'Unless you want-'

'No,' she said, just as quickly.

He looked up at her, unable to reach for her. She knelt in front of him, putting the scanner on the floor and tugging at his laces before pulling his trainers off. He'd need new ones, he thought idly. New suit, too. This one'd definitely had it.

'Probably when you went through that window,' Rose said from her position on the floor, patiently removing his socks. He looked up at her sharply. He hadn't spoken aloud. She smiled. 'You were looking at them like you were never going to see them again.' She stood and pulled her boots off, then slid her jeans down her legs.

She definitely knew that look on this face, he mused as he watched her. Too well. 'I won't send you away again,' he murmured as Rose pulled him to his feet and undid the fastening on his trousers.

She paused, her eyes searching his. 'Good.'

\/\/


	5. Chapter 5

The Doctor looked down at her, watching as she kicked his trousers away, leaving them both standing there in their underwear. He was aware that he was watching her with the wrong kind of intensity. His eyes tracking over her, drinking her in as though she'd disappear. As though she'd leave him.

He cleared his throat. 'Rose-'

'Shh,' she murmured, raising a hand and planting it on his chest, spreading her fingers wide.

He tried again. 'I want-'

'Lie down.'

He allowed her to push him gently until he was sitting on the edge of the bed, then brought his feet up and lay back against the pillows obediently. Rose climbed up beside him, one arm resting over his chest, her hand between his hearts, a leg slung over both of his. He buried his mouth and nose in her hair, closing his eyes.

'Thank you,' he said finally. 'For-'

'Yeah,' Rose said softly, sounding exhausted. 'Not bad for an abomination.' He felt her body tense as she realised what she'd said.

'You're not-' he began, wanting to explain it away, to reassure her even as he worried at the problem.

'I know,' she interrupted. After a few moments of silence, she sighed. 'You need to rest, Doctor.'

He wanted to talk to her, to hash this out, to understand what had happened today, but he yawned, surprising himself. 'Yeah. I'll... I think I'll sleep for a bit.' Rose didn't respond, was already asleep against his chest. He tightened his grip on her even as he felt himself losing consciousness.

\/\/

The Doctor looked around, finding himself in the console room with no memory of how he got there. Last thing he remembered he'd been tucked up in bed with Rose, falling asleep. Surely he could dream something more imaginative than an empty, dark console room?

'So… this is a bit of a turn up, isn't it?'

The Doctor spun on his heel, staring around the room. _No, no, no…_

But it was. The Master was leaning against the jumpseat watching the time rotor oscillate with his arms folded over his chest. This wasn't the Master as he'd seen him most recently, however. No, this was Harry Saxon. Cool, calm, collected and one hundred percent insane. Only the other time lord's eyes were different. They burned with the knowledge of what had happened to him.

'You're-' the Doctor managed, finding his voice.

'Dead?' the Master said. 'Yes, I know. Thanks for bringing it up though, were you worried I might have forgotten?'

'I'm dreaming,' the Doctor said.

The Master pulled a face. 'I'd ask for a refund if I were you. Seriously,' he said, pushing away from the jumpseat and circling the console. 'I'm flattered, but I'd hope you had better things to dream about.' He came to a stop in front of the Doctor. 'This isn't a dream.'

'How did you-' The Doctor began.

'I thought, if our dear Lord President can put himself in my head… what's to stop me doing the same thing to you? Putting a little bit of myself in there?' he reached forwards and tapped the Doctor's forehead. 'Don't worry. I'm just a message. A closed piece of my own time, stored in your head.'

The Doctor stepped back and brought his hands up to his face, idly noting the cuts that had peppered them were gone. 'What do you want?'

'Is that any way to greet an old friend?' the Master smirked. When the Doctor just continued to stare at him he shrugged. 'She would have accepted it, you know.'

The Doctor narrowed his eyes.

'If you'd decided to let Rassilon rip the time vortex to shreds, she would have let you.' The Master chuckled darkly. 'It would have torn her apart, of course. Terribly _painful_ death to inflict on someone, Doctor. I'd have been so proud.'

'She would have ceased to exist, the same as everybody else,' the Doctor corrected, his voice quite a bit more hoarse than he'd intended.

'No,' the Master said sharply. 'Look at her!'

The Doctor followed the direction of the Master's gaze and found that they were in the bedroom. Rose was sleeping on the bed, curled around his own sleeping form, her hand resting lightly on his chest.

'Look at her properly,' the Master ordered. 'Look at her like a Time Lord. If you still can,' he added, scornfully.

The Doctor stared at Rose, allowing his eyes to refocus while trying to blot out the Master's pseudo-presence. He saw only the gold time traces running over her, through her. 'She looks like she always does,' he said, approaching the bed softly and standing over himself and Rose, his eyes running over her again and again.

'Look closer. Closer, closer and closer, until…'

The Master trailed off as the Doctor, both the version of him standing and the sleeping Time Lord, sucked in a deep breath as the time weaving itself through Rose coalesced, became even less complex than was usual.

'There's a word for things like her.'

'Rose isn't a thing.'

'Whatever. She screamed your name, you know. In her head. Rassilon was trying to kill one of us, caught her, and she screamed your _name_. Although,' he added thoughtfully, '_howled_ might be more appropriate.'

'Right. I've had enough of this. What do you want?' the Doctor snapped, turning on the Master.

'I want to warn you,' the Master said, suddenly serious. He inclined his head towards the bed, his eyes intent on the Doctor's.

'Warn me?' the Doctor repeated. When no answer was forthcoming, he glared at the Master. 'Why did you do it? Why did you save her? Me?'

'You'll see,' the Master said enigmatically.

'Oh,' the Doctor said. 'Don't do _that_. Go on, tell me.'

'She knows,' the Master said, nodding towards Rose. 'You'll find out from her when you look into her mind.'

'We don't… I won't do that.'

'Liar,' the Master said, his tone amused. 'I haven't got much time here, so there's really no point in lying to me. I'm disappointed you'd even try, frankly.'

The Doctor closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. The Master was hard work. 'You're been in her head.' A statement, not a question.

The Master smiled beatifically as the room shifted again, became the console room once more. Rose was there, staring at the Doctor's hologram.

'_I love you_?' the Master repeated as the hologram disappeared. 'How very _human_ of you.'

'Rose is human,' the Doctor defended, and then wondered why he was bothering.

The Master snorted his amusement at that, watching as Rose spoke to the TARDIS, pleaded with the ship. 'You think so? _She_ would have stopped Rassilon.'

The Doctor smiled mirthlessly. 'See? Now you're not even trying to make sense. Not five minutes ago you said she'd have let me.'

'Oh yes, she'd have let you do whatever you thought you needed to do. But her decision was made the moment she saw how much of a coward you actually are. I saw it all, in her lovely little head.'

'Stay out of her mind!' the Doctor growled, knowing it was stupid. The Master was dead. Couldn't touch Rose.

'I will if you will,' the other Time Lord singsonged. The Doctor turned away from him, stalking out of the console room and through the darkened corridors.

'I must say, I'm amazed at your restraint,' the Master called, following him. 'Only once, in all the time you've known her? You're the very model of self-denial. And only then because you thought you were about to die.'

The Doctor turned, glaring at the Master. 'I-'

'Oh do shut up,' the Master said, suddenly serious. 'There's something you ought to see.' He nodded at something over the Doctor's shoulder. 'In there.'

The Doctor turned, seeing that they were in the bedroom again. 'I can't,' he said quietly.

'I don't blame you,' the Master said. The Doctor expected him to go on about how horribly human Rose's mind was, and was surprised when the Master continued in an almost reverential tone. 'She's overwhelming. She burns.'

The Doctor closed his eyes, trying to shut out both the sight of himself and Rose and the Master's voice. 'Yes.'

'And why do you think that is?'

The Doctor turned to see that the Master was now sitting in the armchair on the other side of the room, his fingers steepled in front of his face.

'She was right, your Rose,' the Master said, the teasing quality of his voice almost completely gone now. 'Last time we met she told me names were important. Doctor, Master, Destroyer of Worlds.'

'Shut up,' the Doctor commanded, looking away.

'And the Bad Wolf,' the Master said, ignoring him. 'As soon as it had a name it was a thing. An entity with a life, a purpose. And that's a bit dangerous.'

The Doctor felt his eyes widen, looking at the Master in alarm. 'Rose-'

'Not for her,' the Master interrupted. He cocked his head to the side, as though considering his statement. 'Well… a _bit_ for her. But not much. Not much at all. Poor Rassilon. Woe betide the man – or Time Lord – who tries to come between Time and her champion.'

He pushed himself up out of the chair, strolling past the Doctor and looking down at Rose. 'She really is _fascinating_. You were in her head long before you put yourself there. You loom large, blocking out everything else. Everyone else. Right now - for me - she's ready to die to save you. The weight of you – the last of the Time Lords – could kill her _so very easily_.' He turned and glared at the Doctor. 'Don't let that happen.'

\/\/

The Doctor awoke. He lifted his head from the pillow, staring around the room. It was empty. The Master wasn't here, had never been here physically. He looked down to where Rose slept against his chest. Easiest thing in the universe to wake her up, ask her what the Master had been going on about.

_But_… but what if she didn't know? Worse yet, what if she didn't want to tell him, for fear of hurting him?

Gently, carefully, he rolled Rose until she was lying on her side. Then he scooted down in the bed so he was lying face to face with her. He studied her for a moment, allowing his eyes to track over her face, tracing features he knew better than his own. Had known longer, anyway. He didn't look for the time he knew was there, refused to see it.

Slowly, he raised his fingertips to her temples, pushing through his own hesitation. After all, this was certainly no worse than what he'd done in the console room. She'd had no warning then, either. No way to prepare herself. To defend herself. And she'd pulled him in. Wanted him there.

As her mind surrounded him he wound his way inward, looking for her recent memories. What he was looking for was there and they should be close to the surface. No sense rooting around in her mind, not when he wasn't invited. Unconscious, the heat of her was diminished, her mind only slightly warmer than he'd expect for a human.

Ah. There it was. Or rather, there _he_ was.

He was kneeling, frozen in front of her. The Master and Rose seemed to be the only ones in the room moving through time. The Doctor looked at Rose. She was in pain, her skin blanched with the effort of holding herself together against the onslaught of the Lord President's gauntlet coupled with the Master's energy blast.

She raised pleading eyes to the Master. 'Stop it'

'I can't,' the Master said, sounding as though he was explaining something to a child. 'If I stop you'll die.'

'It doesn't matter. He'll be safe, they'll all be safe.'

'Oh, but you're human, what about your family? Friends?' the Master taunted. 'Surely someone not in this room cares what happens to you?'

Rose shook her head, clenching her jaw tightly.

The Master narrowed his eyes at her. 'No. No one's daughter. That's you, Rose Tyler.'

'_Please_.'

'You're so willing to die for him?' He blinked as he realised the truth of it. 'You are. You really are. You came here ready to be sacrificed. Like a good little lamb to the slaughter.' The Master sounded angry. Furious. 'Well, _Commander_ Tyler, you're out of luck. I get to be the sacrifice today. _You_ stop it.'

'I don't know what you mean!' Rose sounded terrified, her eyes wide even as her jaw tensed against the pain. 'Please. It hurts.'

The Master laughed. 'We're outside time! Look at him,' he nodded towards the Doctor, 'frozen down there while we have a nice little chat. You're doing that! Think of all that power running through you. Time itself! Just imagine everything you can do. You've done it before. Just… make it stop.'

The Doctor watched Rose's eyes fall closed. Felt time shudder, realign and push _outwards_. Rassilon staggered as the Master fell to the ground, both bursts of energy shutting down in the face of the golden flare he'd been unable to see before.

And he knew what the Master had meant. All of it. _There's a word for things like her_. There were thousands. Thousands and thousands of words to describe Rose Tyler. And that was just in English. But right now… right now there was just one.

'Avatar,' he murmured.

\/\/


	6. Chapter 6

'What's that?'

The Doctor's eyes snapped open to find Rose looking up at him. He snatched his hands away from her face, but she reached up and grabbed his wrists, holding him still.

'Were you in my head?' she asked

'No!' He said quickly, watching her eyebrows head for her hairline. 'Well... Yes. A bit. Not much at all really.' He winced slightly. 'I'm sorry?' He tried

'It's ok,' she said softly, sounding amused.

'Rose-'

'Honestly, Doctor,' she assured him, her thumbs beginning to stroke over his wrists gently, 'it's ok.'

He sighed. 'It's really not,' he said, aware he was probably not making this better. 'I just wanted to see what happened. Needed,' he amended. 'I needed to see what happened.'

'An' you couldn't have waited 'til I was awake?'

He looked away, his gaze falling to his wrist, still captured in her fingers. Seeing the direction of his gaze, Rose exerted gentle pressure, bringing his fingertips back to rest at her temples.

'Rose- ' he said, the beginning of his protest sounding weak even to his own ears.

'I wanna see what you were lookin' at. In my head.'

'It's not... It doesn't matter what...' he trailed off as he felt her surrounding him again. Hotter this time, now she was awake. The intense heat was almost uncomfortable. Almost, but not quite.

The images around them resolved themselves and they were once again in the Naismith mansion, watching the interchange between Rose and the Master.

'Oh.'

The Doctor turned and saw Rose watching the scene, her expression one of dawning understanding. He felt the connection break as Rose dropped his hands, shuffling back slightly on the bed to put some space between them.

'But how did you know that happened?' she asked. 'He said you were frozen in time or something.'

'I... Had a dream.' At her somewhat sarcastic look he continued, 'Well... Not really a dream. More like a vision. A message. A-'

'Doctor?' she prompted, trying to bring him back on track.

'Sorry. The Master told me.'

'What? While we were sleepin'?'

'Yep. Kept dragging me back and forth between the bedroom and the console room, telling me there was something I needed to know. About you.'

'Dragging?'

'Metaphorically.'

She nodded her understanding. 'What about me?' she asked, her eyes suddenly finding his neck very interesting.

'You were asleep,' he reminded her.

'No, what did he want you to know about me?'

He shifted uncomfortably, rolling to lie on his back.

'Doctor?' she asked, finally looking up at his face again.

The Doctor didn't know what to say. All the bits and pieces that had been slowly turning over in his brain over the last year had coalesced into one terrifying whole and he realised he was frozen with the fear that if he told her, if he told her what he suspected – what the Master had decided he _knew_ – she'd leave him.

She'd put up with a lot in order to be here, to stay beside him. More than anyone could be expected to, really. From ghosts and Daleks to his sudden regeneration, to countless near death experiences, the loss of her family, to watching what had happened to Donna... And those were just the highlights. But this? He didn't know if he could keep her through this.

She'd leave him. Go and live in Cardiff. With _Torchwood_. And Jack. Jack, who'd never hurt her. Never put her through so much pain.

'Doctor?' She prompted, leaning up on her elbow so she could see him.

He sighed, stilling his whirring mind. 'The man with the gauntlet,' he said, 'what was his name?'

'Rassilon,' she said, promptly. She looked confused a moment, then went on, 'That's what you called him, yeah?'

'Yes.' He had _technically_ named Rassilon in front of her, even if she'd been unconscious at the time. 'And the Master? What's his-'

'Koschei,' she said, beginning to look worried now.

'And my name?' He couldn't look at her, instead keeping his eyes fixed on the far off ceiling of the room.

Nevertheless, out of the corner of his eye, he saw her start to form the first syllable, before her brain realised she couldn't possibly know this and prompted her to say, 'I don't know.'

'What's. My. Name?'

'Theta Sigma,' she said, her voice a whisper, almost breathless. 'They called you Theta Sigma. But it's not all. There's somethin' else. Somethin' just out of reach…'

He closed his eyes, suppressing the slight shudder that ran through him. 'And how do you know that?'

Rose jumped up out of the bed, backing away from him. 'No.'

'Rose?' He opened his eyes and sat up, watching her with concerned eyes. 'What-'

'You can't! You can't do what you did to Donna! Not to me. I won't let you.'

_Ah_. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood. 'Rose-' he said, taking a tentative step towards her, 'I'm not going to erase your memory.'

'But I know-'

'I don't have to,' he interrupted, desperate to stop her backing away from him. 'You've known for ages, it's not like what happened to Donna.'

She paused, still retaining that air of fight or flight, but trusting him enough not to run. 'Then why do you look so…'

'So what?' he asked, pausing a few steps away from her.

'So sad?' she asked.

He regarded her a moment, watching her breathing slow to a normal pace, feeling the panic around her subsiding slightly. 'I'm afraid you're not going to like what I have to say.'

'You said you wouldn't send me away again,' she reminded him.

'What?' he asked, genuinely surprised.

'Before… you said-'

'No! I'm not…' he paused, took a deep breath. 'Rose,' he said, quietly. 'I promise I won't send you away. You never have to go anywhere.' He paused. 'Unless you want to.'

'I'll never want to,' she said, certain even through her confusion. His expression must have betrayed his inner apprehension at her words, because she went on. 'I told you. I'm here. Forever.'

'How did you get the TARDIS to take you to Earth?' he asked casually. Well… as casually as he could, considering the level of anxiety he was operating under and the fact that he was still mostly undressed. 'She was programmed not to…'

She shrugged, folding her arms over her chest, as though she too had suddenly become aware of her state of undress. 'I asked,' she said nonchalantly. Then she bent down and retrieved his shirt from the floor, slipping it on and looking up at him defiantly, as though daring him to comment.

'You asked,' he said flatly.

'Yeah. Nicely. Said please an' everything.'

'Were you conscious when you got to Cardiff?'

She stared at him, giving him his answer. He nodded slowly. When he didn't seem to be about to add anything, Rose walked towards him, stopping with only inches between them. 'Tell me.'

He took a deep breath, breathing her in as though she were oxygen. 'I think you've… changed,' he said, then frowned at the lack of finesse in the sentence. 'I think… Rose, you know things you couldn't possibly know, you've done things you shouldn't have been able to do! I-'

'The Master was in my head. On the _Valiant_. He must have left some stuff behind,' she shrugged. 'And the TARDIS likes me. And you. She wanted to help me.'

'And what about when Rassilon tried to kill you? When you were caught between the gauntlet and the Master? You should have _died_, Rose.' She stiffened, but didn't back away. He scrubbed a hand over his face, through his hair. 'You shouldn't have been there. I should have-'

'I had to find you!' she said. 'I would have done anything…'

It was his turn to stare now. She was breathing hard again, her face flushed and her eyes too bright, wet with unshed tears. She glared at him, frustrated, angry and afraid. Then she reached up dragging his hands up to her face.

And he was in her head. And he _saw_.Bad Wolf. Never about the Daleks, never about the Universe, or the Earth.

It was about him. _For_ him. Always a way back to him. From Earth to Satellite 5. From Pete's World to the _Valiant_. From the vortex to Cardiff. She would drag herself across the metaphorical broken glass of time and space. For him. The TARDIS had recognised a higher authority than his own. The girl shot through with Time. Built for the last of the Time Lords as his tenth incarnation had been built for her.

The girl with his name in her head. She should be _burning_. She really shouldn't be able to force the mental connection. The Doctor felt his own fear run through him. He wanted her safe. The Master had taunted him in his complete failure to keep her safe, and he was right.

'I don't want to be without you.' She said the words aloud, speaking into the silent room, but he felt them reverberate through her mind.

'You're not _safe_ with me,' he whispered.

'An' you're not safe _without_ me, so you're stuck with me.' She paused and he felt her focus shift. 'Tell me what's changed.'

Wordlessly, he showed her what he'd seen. The sheer impossibility of everything he'd been trying to ignore for the last year. Then he showed her the Master, firing his energy at her, his life. He felt the moment she made the connection.

'I'm different,' she said aloud, seemingly unaware that he heard the question in her mind before she asked it.

_Yes._

'You said avatar. What's it mean?'

Rather than respond with more pseudo words, he showed her. Countless cultures with countless gods, demons and devils. All with an avatar – a living representation.

He felt her amusement ripple through her like water. 'I'm not-'

'You're Time,' he said aloud, his voice hoarse. 'I can see it, all over you, stronger every day. That's why you were able to be in that parallel world created around Donna. It's why you could stop the TARDIS just by asking. And it's why he saved you.' He broke off, unable to continue aloud anymore. _And it's why you're going to leave me. You're not human any more Rose._

He expected her to back away, to break the connection. Instead, she kept her eyes closed. 'Does that upset you? That I'm not?' she asked.

_Yes_, he admitted. She did recoil then, tried to pull away from him, but he held her firm, sensing her misunderstanding. 'No, Rose.' _I meant… I'm worried about you! I love you and I need you and I'm so afraid, I'm so very afraid, Rose, that this'll be the straw that broke the-_

She was kissing him. His fingertips were still at her temples, their minds were still connected and she was kissing him. Right. He knew there was a reason he didn't do this with her. Console room incident notwithstanding. She was overwhelming enough to be with anyway. Without overwhelming every single superior sense he possessed.

_Thinking too much… _

He felt her thought, rather than heard her speak aloud as he mouth moved to his neck and laughed suddenly. She planted both hands on his chest and shoved him. Hard. Forcing him back onto the bed and breaking their connection. He leaned up on his elbows, looking up at her as she approached him.

'I told you,' she said firmly, climbing onto the bed, resting her body over his. 'I'm not going anywhere.'

\/\/


	7. Chapter 7

They'd been in the console room for about an hour, the Doctor lying half under the console, ostensibly working on the TARDIS. In reality, he'd managed to give himself three shocks and one minor burn as a direct result of all his attention being devoted to the woman sitting in the jumpseat, rather than the TARDIS console.

Rose, the woman in question, had been sitting the jumpseat staring up at the time rotor almost since the moment they'd entered the room. A thoughtful silence had descended as they were dressing and hadn't lifted since. From time to time the Doctor had felt her attention on him, her mindset pensive, as though trying to work something out.

Several times he'd wanted to ask her what was going on, what she was thinking, but had chickened out. She's said she wasn't going to leave him. Promised. But she'd not really had time to digest what he'd told her. Was that what she was doing now? Reconsidering? The Doctor glared at the exposed wires in front of him, as though daring them to attempt to electocute him.

'Last time we were in here you were in my head,' Rose said absently, simultaneously proving that shocks could come from strange places and that no amount of glaring could get the console to behave today.

He sat up, looking up at her. 'Yeah,' he said slowly, 'I was.'

'Why?' she asked, finally looking at him. 'Did you know there was…'

'What?' he asked, pulling himself to his feet and brushing himself down, flicking away dust that he knew wasn't there.

'Did you know there was something wrong with me?'

'Rose…' he began, but his denial died in this throat. 'Is that how you feel? Like there's something wrong with you?'

She looked away from him, her eyes returning to the console. Now that he'd stopped working, the lights in the console room had dimmed and soft gold and blue-green light illuminated Rose's face as she resolutely kept her eyes away from his. 'No,' she said finally. 'But you-'

'I what?' he demanded softly, leaning against the console with his arms folded over his chest, eyebrows raised.

'You never did that before,' she said quietly, her tone almost one of embarrassment.

He stared at her, his jaw opening and closing a few times before he realised how ridiculous he looked and said, 'Rose-'

'Can we go to Cardiff?' she asked suddenly, looking at him again.

He studied her face a moment, seeing none of the uncertainty that had been there before. Whatever decision she'd been on the brink of, she'd made it. Something he'd said – or not said – had helped her make it.

He realised she was waiting for an answer. 'Right! Yes! Ok, then.' He stared at her for a moment longer, unmoving, then forced himself to turn to the console, flicking switches and turning dials. 'Just after we dropped Jack off ok for you? Or did you have something more-'

Her hand on his stopped him mid-sentence. 'I'm not leaving,' she said.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. 'No?'

'No,' she said firmly, rolling her eyes at him. 'I just… I wanted to see Martha.' He gave her a look and she hastily added, 'To say thanks, you know. For helpin' me.'

'Right,' he said, still not convinced. The TARDIS lurched, pressing Rose against him. He tamped down the sudden urge to grab hold of her, to force her to stay with him. 'Here we are,' he said, false brightness ringing in his tone. 'Good old Cardiff.'

Rose nodded and headed towards the doors. As she opened it she turned and looked at him over her shoulder. 'Stop being an idiot.'

He raised his eyebrows in mock offence. 'I'm not-'

'You are,' she said. 'I told you. I'm not goin' anywhere, Doctor.'

\/\/

'The Doctor should be doing this,' Martha said, looking up at Rose. 'I don't know what I'm looking for.' Nevertheless, she slid the needle into Rose's arm, drawing a small amount of blood.

'You know what should be there though, right?' Rose asked. Martha nodded. 'Well, then.' She nodded at Martha, an indication that she should proceed.

Martha shook her head slightly and bent to her work again. 'Where is he, anyway?'

'He wouldn't come down here,' Rose said, 'doesn't like Torchwood.'

'Do you blame him?' Martha asked absently as she turned to the machine at her side.

Rose shrugged and yawned. Martha regarded her seriously. 'Don't take this the wrong way but you look exhausted. When did you last sleep?'

'Got a couple of hours not too long ago.'

'And before that?'

'When I was here.'

Martha looked annoyed. 'Rose, you're not him. You need to sleep. Regularly,' she added firmly as Rose opened her mouth to protest. 'And you weren't asleep when you were here, you were unconscious.'

'I know,' Rose said, her tone almost one of defeat. She lay back on the bed. 'Might have a nap now.'

Martha nodded absently, her eyes on her monitor.

\/\/

Jack stepped off the lift and looked around. He spotted the Doctor leaning against some railings, looking out over the area without apparently seeing it. He looked tired, Jack thought as he approached, noting that the Time Lord's hair was insanely mussed, as though he'd run his hands through it once too often today.

As he approached, the Doctor said, 'Martha find anything?'

'Good morning to you, too.' Jack said lightly, coming to lean on the railing beside his friend. The Doctor ignored him. 'How d'you mean?'

'I know why Rose wanted to come here, Jack. Martha's a doctor.'

'Maybe she just couldn't stay away,' the captain said, throwing the Doctor a wink. At his friend's worried look, Jack said. 'Oh come on, you don't seriously think… you do, don't ya?' he blew out a breath. 'Wow.'

'Did Rose tell you what's happened to her?'

'I heard her telling Martha,' Jack admitted.

'Surprised she didn't tell you first, considering.' The Doctor gestured towards Jack. He sighed. 'I don't know what to tell her, Jack.'

'Why?

'She's got a little bit of time... Well... A _lot_ of Time - capital T, there - on her, through her. _In_ her. I see it sometimes, out of the corner of my eye.'

'And this is a bad thing because...?' Jack prompted.

'Its getting stronger and stronger. I couldn't even see it until she came back from the parallel world. And now she can force the TARDIS to do something just by asking and protect herself from Rassilon. Convince the Master…' he trailed off. 'I thought I'd taken it all out of her but I don't even know what this _is_, why it's happening. What if it's tearing her apart? She said it herself, on satellite 5. Everything dies. Time destroys everything.'

'Well,' Jack said, 'I think I'm living proof that whatever's going on with Rose, it doesn't just destroy. Time also creates everything, ever think of that?'

The Doctor nodded glumly.

Jack rolled his eyes at his friend's look of utter dejection. 'Lotta opportunity there,' he said speculatively. 'For the right Time Lord.' He could _feel_ the Doctor rolling his eyes.

'The Master thought that. I saw it when he was in my head.'

'He was in your head?' Jack asked.

'Long story. Just for a second, he saw himself with my TARDIS and my... with Rose. The Master and the Bad Wolf.'

'How bad was it?'

'Oh... Horrific. It was-' the Doctor broke off in mid-sentence, straightening. 'Something's wrong. Rose is hurt.'

\/\/

They entered the hub's infirmary at a run. Martha was leaning heavily on Rose's shoulders, trying to hold her still as Rose shook violently.

'Is she having a fit?' Jack asked.

'I don't know!' Martha said. 'She was asleep.'

The Doctor darted forwards, helping Martha hold Rose still. 'What did you give her? What tests did you run?'

'I took some blood and a couple of other samples. She wanted me to analyse her DNA.'

The Doctor reached into his jacket, yanking the sonic screwdriver free of his pocket. 'Why didn't she ask me?' He muttered, activating it and using it to check Rose's pupils. 'I could have done that on the TARDIS. Unless...' He paused looking up at Jack thoughtfully.

'Unless what?' Martha demanded.

Before he could answer, Rose stilled. 'Doctor,' she murmured. 'Doctor, don't let him-'

Surprised, the Doctor shut off the sonic. Rose moved restlessly. 'Martha, step back.'

'She'll hurt herself!' Martha snapped.

'She won't. I need you to step back Martha.'

When Martha still didn't move, Jack stepped forwards and pulled her away gently.

'Jack-'

'Shh.'

The Doctor moved closer to the bed, activating the sonic and running it over Rose's body. She stilled almost immediately, a slight frown marring her features.

'She's asleep,' Martha said, sounding relieved.

'She's not,' the Doctor said absently, his eyes intent on Rose's face, tongue resting against his top teeth.

'Rose is a real light sleeper,' Jack supplied.

The Doctor flicked his eyes over his friend quickly, somerthing akin to annoyance in his gaze. 'She's unconscious,' he said. He glanced at Martha, 'You didn't give her anything?'

Martha shook her head. 'She did look exhausted. I told her to rest.'

'And she what? Just went straight to sleep?' The Doctor scoffed.

'Yeah,' Martha said.

The Doctor deactivated the sonic, whirling to face Martha for further questioning. Just as he opened his mouth, Rose screamed.


	8. Chapter 8

Martha stepped forwards, pushing the Doctor aside and snatching a syringe from the table.

'What are you doing?' the Doctor asked.

'Sedating her,' Martha said, raising the syringe to her eyes.

'Don't.' The Doctor grabbed her hand. 'She's not in pain. I'd know.'

'Doctor-' Jack began.

'No!' the Doctor insisted, just as Rose's eyes snapped open.

'The woman!' she gasped, struggling to sit up.

'What woman?' the Doctor asked, moving to her side and trying to settle her.

'The one with her face covered,' Rose said hoarsely, batting his hands away and raising herself into a sitting position. 'I saw her. In my... dream. Who is she?'

The Doctor could feel Martha and Jack turn their attention to him. It was too soon. He couldn't talk about this. And definitely not in front of them. He handed Rose a cup of water. 'Never mind that now,' he said softly. 'What did she say?'

'Tell me. If I'm gonna have random Time Lords and... Ladies?' He nodded his head at the slight questioning tone in her voice. 'If they're gonna be droppin' into my head for a quick chat, I deserve to know who they are. The Master was bad enough, but this one was practically interviewing me.'

He nodded again. 'Makes sense. She was... Well… I suppose you could say that she was my mother,' he said, keeping his attention fixed on Rose and trying to ignore the surprise he could feel radiating from Martha and Jack. 'You know,' he shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets, 'if you were overly keen on a label.'

'Your _mother_?' Martha repeated.

The Doctor kept his gaze on Rose and didn't respond to either Martha's work or the look he could feel Jack giving him. She stared at him a moment before blinking and continuing, managing to mask her own surprise quite well.

'She asked what would have happened if you hadn't stopped them.'

'And what did you say?' He asked, inclining his head towards her and fixing her with an intense stare.

'That I knew you would,' she said, looking up at him, her tone almost defensive.

'What if I hadn't?' She ignored him. 'Rose,' he said sharply. 'What if I hadn't?'

'You did,' she said, her tone holding firm even as her gaze skittered away from his.

'But what if I hadn't?' he asked, catching her chin in his hand and holding her face still, forcing her to hold his gaze.

She shrugged. 'Then I s'pose I would have done somethin'.'

He regarded her for a long moment. Then said, 'Jack? Martha? Can you give us a minute?'

'Doctor,' Martha began, 'Rose needs-'

He turned to look at them, reinforcing his words with a stern expression. '_This _minute, if you don't mind. If Rose needs a doctor I'm just here.'

Martha looked to Rose, who nodded, the movement dislodging the Doctor's hand. Reluctantly, Martha followed Jack out of the infirmary, closing the door behind them.

Rose and the Doctor regarded one another for a moment, then both spoke at the same time.

'Rose, I need-'

'You want-'

They stopped simultaneously. Rose laughed. 'You wanna look inside my head again, don't you?'

He nodded. 'I need to see what happened. I need to know why-'

'It's ok. I trust you. You know that.'

'It's not that…' he sighed and ran a hand through his hair before turning and sitting on the bed next to her. She took his hand, threading her fingers through his own. The Doctor stared down at their joined hands for a moment before speaking. 'Before, on the TARDIS, you pointed out that we'd never done this before.' She nodded. 'It's not that I never wanted to,' he said, keeping his gaze on their hands, safely away from her face. 'Even before Canary Wharf… I wanted… I _really_ wanted to. You can't imagine how much…'

'Think I can,' she murmured, almost under her breath.

He glanced at her from beneath his lashes before clearing his throat and directing his gaze at their hands again. 'Yes… well…' he cleared his throat and reached up with his free hand, loosening his tie. 'I was afraid. Afraid it would be too much… that _you'd_ be too much.'

''Cos of the Bad Wolf stuff, yeah?'

'Uh... no, actually. Just you, Rose Tyler.'

She looked up and saw he was watching her now, his dark eyes intent on her face. 'So-' she began, her voice alarmingly tremulous. She cleared her throat and tried again. 'So what changed your mind?'

'I thought I was going to die. I needed you.' He swallowed. 'The thought – the _knowledge_ – that I was sending you away, that after everything I wasn't going to see you again…'

She reached up and rested her free hand against his cheek. ''m here now. You should know by now that I don't stay sent.'

'Afterwards, in the bedroom... I could have just asked you what happened with the Master.'

'Wouldn't have been the same as seeing it,' she pointed out reasonably, defending his actions.

'Maybe that's it,' he agreed. 'Or _maybe_ I just don't have the strength anymore.'

'The strength?'

'To... not.'

She studied him for a moment, watching him as he began to squirm under her scrutiny.

He looked away from her, back down at their hands. 'I could try not to, if you don't-'

'I like it,' she admitted quietly.

His head snapped up. 'Oh. Really?'

'Yeah.'

'Well, that's... That's...'

'Brilliant, yeah?' she asked, grinning at him. He smiled, ducking his head, almost embarrassed. 'So...' She began, 'you wanna see my... dream?'

He nodded and slid from the bed, landing on the infirmary floor with a thump. He stepped towards her raising his hands to her face as Rose parted her legs slightly so he could stand between them, leaning against the bed.

He glanced down at her legs as she moved them, then looked back up at her, raising his eyebrows slightly and smirking. She bit the inside of her cheek, endeavouring to look solemn and innocent all at once and only managing to look as though she was about to burst out laughing.

He shook his head at her, amused, then closed his eyes as he formed the link between their minds. Rose wasn't with him. She seemed to be standing some way away, blinking in the near darkness that surrounded her.

'Where's he gone?' she asked, speaking to herself.

'Who?' the voice came out of the darkness and out of the past. His eyes snapped to the woman's face, some part of his mind noting that she appeared to have recovered her authority now she could stand.

'The Master, he was here…' Rose said. 'He was… hurting me.'

'You were dreaming, Rose Tyler.'

'I saw you, at the mansion,' Rose said, studying the woman's face. The woman inclined her head. 'This is a dream, yeah?'

'Why are you asking? Don't you know?'

Rose shrugged. 'Been having weird not-dreams lately.'

'This isn't a dream. It would be more appropriate to call it a... Visitation.'

'Like what the Master did to the Doctor?'

The woman looked pleased, as though Rose had impressed her. 'I wanted to meet you. The girl loved by Time. But _he_ loves you in such a very human way. The Doctor.'

'What's wrong with that?'

'Nothing. Nothing whatsoever. It's typical of him. To show humanity when he is not. When_ you _are-'

'What?'

'Tell me, Rose Tyler, what would you have done, had the Doctor not decided to stop Rassilon?'

Rose shrugged. 'He did.'

'He might not have done. You said you had to allow him to make the decision, which reveals your awareness that there was a decision to be made. What would you have done, had he decided differently?'

'I would have done something,' Rose said, her tone firm.

'You would have done something,' the woman repeated. 'You sound sure that there was something you could have done.'

Rose shrugged. 'Who are you?'

'How long are you going to stay with him?' The woman's tone had changed, become suddenly desperate.

'Are you ok?' Rose asked, concerned. She made to move forward, but stopped short when the woman raised a hand.

'I'm running out of time. Curious that you are not. How long?'

Rose didn't speak aloud but her response was so emphatic it reverberated between them, so loud it could have been shouted. _Forever_.

'Ah. And when he regenerates? Will you stay with him then?' She laughed suddenly. 'It's not even a question for you, is it? Remarkable child.'

Rose balked slightly at being called a child. 'Why bother askin' if you were just gonna take the answer out of my head?'

'No wonder Rassilon is so afraid,' the woman said, as though Rose hadn't spoken. 'The very thing he was going to destroy, standing in front of him all wrapped up in a human girl. And the Doctor believes in you so strongly. So unswervingly. I ask you again: how long are you going to stay with him, Rose Tyler? Answer me aloud.'

'Forever. I'm gonna stay with him forever.'

'And you understand that words have power? That the right word, spoken at the right time, can change the universe?'

Rose thought about that for a second. But that was what the Doctor _did_, wasn't it? The right word - or _words_, knowing him - in the right place. And then there were the words that had followed them everywhere. Bad Wolf. She nodded.

'Then this is yours.'

Pain. Bright, abrasive, hot pain. It was everywhere. The Doctor watched Rose as she was wracked with it. Then watched her fade, reappearing at his side, the version of herself no longer constrained by the memory.

'Beware Time Lords bearing gifts...' he murmured.

The woman looked up, surprised. 'My Lord Doctor.'

The Doctor nodded, taking Rose's hand. 'My Lady,' he said, nodding in greeting. 'What's happening for you? Right now?'

The woman's eyes rose from their joined hands to his face. 'The Master is duelling with the Lord President. Rassilon is trying to work out how to dispense with one of you two,' she nodded towards Rose and the Doctor, 'without putting himself at risk from the other. Or if he can do away with both simultaneously. You have upset him,' she finished, directing her gaze at the Doctor.

'He does that,' Rose said.

The woman smiled. 'He always has.' She looked at the Doctor. 'The plan you made with Romana... When you took the Moment-'

'I had to,' he said, sounding as though he was apologising. Rose's fingers tightened around his.

'I know. No one else could have done it. None of us. The war changed Rassilon.'

'It changed all of us,' the Doctor said hoarsely.

'Not you.'

'Me too. You didn't see me after. Before I met Rose.' Startled, Rose looked up at him, her fingers tightening around his own. He grinned down at her, momentarily distracted, then looked up again. I have to say, I think it's a bit rude. You just dropping into Rose's mind uninvited. Don't you think that's rude, Rose?'

'Pot, kettle, black, Doctor.'

The Time Lady looked confused by their interchange, then shook her head. 'I can finish what was started by your TARDIS and the Master.'

The Doctor looked up, shaking his head. 'You could. Course you could. But I'm really not sure that's a good idea. Because there's a price.'

'There always is,' she said softly.

'Oi!' Rose said sharply. 'We're not all high and mighty Time Lords here, you know. Haven't all got massive Time Lord brains, either.'

'You want to stay with him forever,' the woman said, seemingly impervious to the Doctor's glare. 'I can help.'

'I said no,' the Doctor's voice was almost a growl. He turned his back on the woman and stared into Rose's eyes. 'I don't think-'

'Shut up,' Rose said. She ran a hand down his arm to soften her words even as she pushed past him. 'What d'you mean?'

'She is spirited,' the woman remarked, smiling at the Doctor.

'Oh you have _no_ idea,' he said, turning to face her.

'Yeah, I'm brilliant, for a human. Whatever. What did you mean?'

'You are covered in Time. Saturated with it. Pure Time. The Time of the vortex.'

'From the TARDIS,' Rose said, the words barely a question.

The Doctor could feel her confusion now, surrounding them, enveloping them. He reached forwards and took her hand, feeling her mind calm as his fingers wrapped around hers.

'You are the Bad Wolf. An entity created by itself, named by itself and fed on Time. And I… I will have nothing to do with Time, once we are locked inside the war again.'

'You can't…' the Doctor insisted, not knowing which of them he was speaking to.

'But I can,' they said, speaking simultaneously.

He stared at them, momentarily speechless. Realising his mouth was hanging open, he snapped it closed, only to reopen it to speak when the words finally forced their way out. 'You wavered, Rose. After Messaline you… you wanted to stay with Jack. Then again after Midnight, you… you weren't sure about… about me.' He held up a finger as she opened her mouth to speak. 'Ah! This… what she's offering…' he paused.

Rose took advantage of his momentary silence. 'I'm already different,' she said quietly. 'And I wasn't going to leave you. I just needed time to think.'

He shook his head, frustrated, wishing they were alone. That they weren't in her head. But he sensed trying to sever the connection would not sit well with Rose just yet. 'What you did, what the Master did, it's not permanent. Stop travelling in the vortex and it'll go away. Eventually.'

'You mean random aliens won't stare at me?'

'When did random aliens ever…' he trailed off at the look she was giving him. 'Right. Yes. Ok, fine. Random aliens won't see anything different about you.'

'I just have to stop travellin' in the vortex, yeah?' He nodded. 'In the TARDIS? Stop travellin' with _you_, in other words.'

'The alternative-'

'The _alternative_,' she interrupted forcefully, 'What _is_ that then? 'Cos you haven't let her get a word in about that.'

'Because it's permanent!' he snapped. 'You'll never be able to go back to how you are now. Never ever.'


	9. Chapter 9

_Author's Note: Just wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed this so far! xx_

* * *

Rose stared at him for a long moment, wide hazel eyes holding his gaze steadily. 'I don't care.' The words were spoken softly, but were no less forceful for that. 'I don't care.' she repeated, louder this time, as though speaking to the universe at large, rather than the two telepathic beings inside her own mind.

As it was he felt the force of her conviction, couldn't deny the truth of her sentiment. But_ oh_, he wanted to… wanted to deny that he was so vital to her, even though he knew she could feel the echo of her own feelings coming from him. Could feel the spark of desire in him that belied the stance he was taking on this.

He held her gaze for a moment, as though standing glaring at her with his mouth hanging open would give her pause. When she merely crossed her arms and returned his glare he gave up. 'You!' He said, whirling away from Rose and pointing. 'You shouldn't be- why _are_ you doing this?'

Wordlessly, Rose reached up and took his hand, pulling it down to his side. He glanced at her questioningly and she smirked, mouthing the word _rude_.

'She is time incarnate. I would not see something such as her destroyed.'

'She's not… she's not a _thing_.'

'She didn't mean it like that,' Rose said comfortingly, earning a smile from the woman but barely a glance from the Time Lord at her side.

'We may be safe in Rose's mind for the moment, but I can still feel you,' the woman said, looking at the Doctor, 'standing in front of me, between the Lord President and the Master. I can feel the strength of your feelings for her, your belief in her and your terror that she stands there unprotected, unarmed. Your love for her, Doctor, simple and complex and something we fail to understand on even as basic a level as humans do. I would not see _you_ destroyed, either.'

The Doctor opened his mouth to speak, but the other Gallifreyan continued quickly. 'You would_ survive_, you always do, but you would be damaged. You said it,' she said, glancing at Rose. 'Time's Champion. It is your purpose, Doctor. You are as much hers as she is yours. And yet you were the only one of us who saw Rose Tyler, rather than the embodiment of chaos, in that room. Would you be without her?'

'No,' he admitted. 'I… can't.'

She regarded him for a moment. 'This form is... Filled with joy. A result of your attachment, no doubt. I believe you were present when he regenerated?'

This last was directed at Rose, but it was the Doctor who answered, his tone distant. 'Rose was the first thing I saw with these eyes.'

'Indeed?' The woman said meaningfully.

The Doctor appeared to recover his equilibrium. 'Listen to me... Just listen. Rose can't make this decision. She doesn't understand-'

'Oi!' Rose said indignantly. 'I'm not thick!'

'And I must tell you, Doctor,' the Time Lady said, her tone betraying amusement, 'that I am not particularly interested in your opinion at this point. I am only interested in Rose's.'

'This thing you're offering…' Rose began. 'What would it do to me?'

'It would advance and enhance the changes that have already been wrought. It would prolong your life. But I must warn you that it would simultaneously be the reason for your death. You will return to the heart of the TARDIS when the time comes. The golden goddess, forever in time.'

The Doctor looked at Rose, studying her face.

'How long would I have?' she asked.

'A few hundred years.'

Rose laughed, making the Doctor stare at her. 'It's not enough,' she explained.

'It's your forever,' the Time Lady said gently. 'And frankly, given the way my Lord Doctor burns through incarnations, it may well be his. The question here is, can you really promise that, young as you are?'

'Yeah.' Rose bit her thumbnail for a moment, considering.

'Rose-' the Doctor began.

'Shh,' she said, making the Time Lady's expression shift into what was possibly the most high class smirk Rose had ever seen. 'What's the catch?' she asked finally.

'You cannot change back. And you would be bound to the Doctor.'

'Bound?'

'As the only surviving member of our race and the owner of the only functioning TARDIS in existence he would be able to locate you, to feel you.'

'Is that why you're so against this?' Rose asked, looking at the Doctor.

'No,' he said, his expression unreadable.

'Then why?'

'How can you agree to this so lightly?' He demanded. 'After everything you've lost because of me you're just going to throw your humanity away like a child with a toy it doesn't care about anymore.'

'You took me away from home and made me better,' she said. 'An' I made my choice a long time ago.'

'Why are you doing this?' he demanded, glaring at the Time Lady. 'The Master was fascinated by Rose too. Is that-'

'The Master was fascinated with her power, as he is with yours,' the Time Lady interrupted. 'As he always has been.'

'No,' Rose said softly. 'That's not all of it. He loves you and hates you. Its all twisted up in his head and he can't make sense out of it. I saw it.' The Doctor stared at her, apparently unable to speak. 'I told you I'm not going anywhere,' Rose said firmly.

The Doctor looked at the Time Lady. 'I can't let you do this to Rose, I'm sorry. It's too much. And too dangerous.'

'I think you underestimate her part in this, Doctor. Did you never wonder why her time traces are so simple? So strong? She designed them. From our perspective she travels from one point in time to another. From A directly to B. Her desperation to reach you forced your TARDIS to submit, to take her where you'd forbidden it to go. And you may not have seen what happened when she stood between the Master and Rassilon, but you felt it - we all did. And you've seen it since. Rose Tyler. The girl who wrote her names across time and space to stay with you. The Bad Wolf, the Valiant Child. And you have chosen not to be without her. _Look at her._'

He stared at Rose, momentarily struck dumb as he saw her spread over time. In the Hendricks basement, waiting for him. Discovering the red bike shed received for Christmas one year, reading the scrawl on the tag which, just her name, in handwriting that had been his.

Saw her as she stood on the ground of the alternate Earth, tears streaming down her face but unable to tear her gaze away. And now, practically wound around him in Torchwood Three's infirmary, her hand clinging to his.

Inside her head, Rose stepped forwards and took his hand. 'What do you want?' she asked quietly.

'I…' he began, unsure how he could complete the sentence. Then the words arrived. Words he'd not said as often as he'd thought them. 'I love you.'

Rose turned her attention to the Time Lady. 'What have we got to do?'

'The Doctor must break his connection with you.'

'What? No! I'm not going anywhere.'

'It is dangerous for you to remain here. Go. I will look after your Rose.'

'Doctor…' Rose said. 'I'll see you soon, yeah?'

'Rose, you can't-' The Doctor blinked. He was in the Torchwood infirmary. Rose had kicked him out of her mind. As he moved to attempt to reconnect, Rose gasped, a plume of brilliant gold escaping from between her lips. Hurriedly, the Doctor moved her so she was lying back on the bed. He pulled one of the chairs over from the edge of the room and sat down, keeping his eyes on Rose.

\/\/


	10. Chapter 10

'_You have been brave. But you must be braver still, Rose Tyler.'_

Rose awoke knowing that hours had passed. She sat up, stretching her arms above her head and groaning when she felt her spine clicking from spending too long on the uncomfortable infirmary bed.

At some point while she'd been… elsewhere, someone had removed her shoes and dimmed the lights. Probably Martha, she thought, or Gwen. The Doctor, currently notable only by his absence, wouldn't have thought to do it. Probably wasn't even speaking to her.

'Sulking,' she muttered, dropping to the floor and heading out to look for his favourite place to sulk – under the TARDIS console.

\/\/

She found the TARDIS in the Plass where they'd parked, the Doctor clearly not comfortable enough to bring it inside Torchwood. She reached the door and opened it, stepping through into the console room.

Jack and the Doctor were deeply engrossed in the console the Doctor was nodding along to whatever ridiculously technical thing Jack was saying, sonic screwdriver clamped between his teeth. His glasses were perched precariously on the end of his nose as he stripped the wires he was holding.

She watched them for a moment as they worked alongside one another in a way she'd not seen since before Satellite Five. Then she cleared her throat.

Both looked up, the Doctor hastily extracting the screwdriver from his mouth.

'Rosie!' Jack said, grinning. 'How you feelin'?'

'Good,' she said, returning his grin. 'I feel good.' Her eyes met the Doctor's and she found she couldn't look away.

Jack raised his eyebrows. 'Good to know. I'll just- I'll be… Come find me before you go,' he said, slipping out past her.

The Doctor dropped his eyes to the monitor and started hitting keys in a way that seemed just a bit too random to be believable.

'You weren't there when I woke up,' Rose said, moving around the console until she was standing beside him.

'Had stuff to do here. You were all right, so I thought I'd make sure the TARDIS was ready for when we…' he said, pausing when he caught her eye. 'Sorry.'

They were silent for a moment, the Doctor resolutely keeping his eyes on the screen and Rose watching him.

'I was always gonna choose this, you know,' she said suddenly. 'Always gonna choose you.'

'I know.'

'Are you all right?'

'I'm always all right,' he said. 'You know that.'

'You're lying,' she accused. 'I can... Feel you. In my head. We're not even touchin' but you're up here. Like a… murmur, in the back of my mind.' When he didn't respond, she swallowed and went on, 'I want to be able to help.'

He looked up at her, the light from the console casting his features into sharp relief. 'I know.'

'I don't want to be packed off just 'cos you think it's too dangerous for me to stay with you,' she added, needing to be certain he understood.

He sighed and turned so he was leaning against the console. 'If Rassilon had attacked me, you planned to get in the way. Planned it. I've done so many things you should hate me for but you keep forgiving me. But you don't forget. You file it all away on your list of things to watch out for.' She shrugged. 'What you just did binds you to me, more so than anything I've dared to do. What happens if that list gets too long?'

'How d'you mean, more than anything you've done?' she asked.

He winced, annoyed at himself for forgetting her ability to pick up on his slips. 'Nothing.'

'Doctor.'

'There's been a tenuous link there for a long time. I'm linked to the TARDIS. You're linked to the TARDIS. Then I… I went inside your head, when we…' he trailed off, sending her a significant look.

'When we? _Oh_!' she bit the inside of her cheek, trying not to laugh. 'Is that why you never…?'

'Yep.' He rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair before crossing his arms. 'I could feel you, when you were in the Torchwood infirmary I could feel that you were in pain.' He looked up at her and she had to bite back a gasp. For just a second he looked afraid, terribly afraid and she _felt _it. Then it was gone, closed down and locked away.

He pushed away from the console and began to pace up and down in front of the jumpseat, tugging at his hair as though deranged. 'Almost everywhere we go – every_when_ - you're in danger. And I have a responsibility, if there's a choice between you and some planet somewhere… Let's say the Earth. Most jeopardy-friendly planet in the universe. Next time some passing alien decides they like the look of this place I _have_ to make the right choice. I'm the only one who can.' He looked desperate now, almost frenzied.

'You're not the only one,' she said. 'There's Jack, and Martha and Mickey-'

'_Torchwood_,' he muttered derisively.

'And Sarah Jane,' she continued, ignoring him. 'And when they're not around there'll be others, Doctor, 'cos you can't turn around without makin' friends.' She paused, taking a breath. 'An' there's me. I'm good at making the right choices too.'

He came to a stop about a metre away, glaring at her. 'You? Rose you are terrible at making the right choices. The fact that you're even standing there, in front of me, proves that!'

She closed her eyes a moment, and he realised he'd not been blocking himself off as effectively as he could have been. She'd felt the anger and fear screaming through his brain.

'I keep tellin' you: I want you safe. An' the only way I _know_ you're safe is if I'm here.'

'And you think that's the right choice, do you?' he said scornfully.

'I _know _it is!' she shot back. The Doctor blinked, almost knocked off his feet by the force of her conviction. 'Keep the Doctor safe, keep the universe safe,' she said, her voice more normal now. 'She gave me her time,' Rose said quietly. 'Said she had no use for it, so she gave it to me. Same as the Master. Said the rest was up to you. And me. Mainly you though, I reckon, 'cos I haven't got a clue what to do next.' She sighed and moved until she was standing in front of him. 'I'm gonna be around for a good long while, Doctor. You're going to have to speak to me at some point.'

He looked down at her. Then his eyes widened. '_The girl in the TARDIS_…'

'What?'

'It's what the Master said, when he first met you onboard the _Valiant_…' he broke of. 'Oh! The _Valiant_.' He grinned down at her, suddenly manic. 'Writing your name across time and space.'

'What _are_ you on about?' Rose asked, exasperated, but unfazed by his mercurial mood.

'_The girl in the TARDIS, the TARDIS in the girl_,' he quoted. 'Except he got it the wrong way round. You're the TARDIS in the girl _now_, you'll be the girl in the TARDIS later. What if it's worse?' he asked, changing tack suddenly, his voice hoarse. 'What if it makes it worse? Having you here for so long, having you in my mind, _burned_ into my mind… what if it makes it worse when you're not here anymore? Physically here. I don't know if I can…'

'I can't keep up with you,' she said.

'I'd be worried if you could,' he remarked, adding, 'Ow!' when she slapped him on the arm.

'One minute you're worried I'm gonna leave ya, next minute you're practically shoving me out the doors!' she said, glaring.

'That's not... You know I don't want you to leave.'

'How long are you gonna stay with me?' she asked.

He stared at her, his eyes flicking from one of hers to the other, as though he was trying to read her. 'You know the answer to that,' he said, finally.

She nodded. 'And if I died tomorrow? How would that be?'

'Rose-'

'It could happen. But you won't leave me behind. You just said so. What are you afraid of?'

'I'm not-' he began.

'You are,' she interrupted. 'You're terrified. I could feel it when you were in my head and I can feel it now. What is it?'

'There's never been anything like you before…' he said. 'Not since, well, _you_, on Satellite Five. I don't know anything about you.'

She laughed, unable to stop herself. 'You know everything about me!' she said, still laughing.

'She said it would kill you,' he reminded her. 'Why aren't you afraid?'

'I'm terrified,' she said, still grinning. Then she sobered. 'Hang on… can't you tell?'

'What?'

'Can't you tell how I'm feeling?' she asked, speaking slowly as though he were being deliberately obtuse.

'We're not properly connected,' he said, tugging at his ear. 'What we've got at the moment is like a tenuous link. Broken over space and time.'

'Is that what she meant?' Rose asked, ignoring his obvious reluctance to continue with this line of conversation.

Rather than evade the question as she'd expected him to, he shoved his hands in his pockets and levelled his gaze at her. 'Yes.'

'Its not that I don't want to,' he said, raising a hand and gesturing between them. 'It's not that at all. As you may have gathered I've clearly got a bit of a problem resisting… _that_… at the moment.'

'Then what is it?' she asked quietly, ignoring the blush she could feel burning her face.

'Its… hard to explain.'

'Show me.'

'That's exactly what I don't want to do,' he admitted. He sighed. 'What do you remember about Satellite Five?'

She raised her eyebrows in surprise. Then she moved away, climbing into the jumpseat and staring at the console. 'I remember… I came back for you,' she said. 'I killed the Daleks, poured time into them and destroyed them. I brought Jack back. It was so easy.'

'Do you remember how it felt?'

'It… hurt,' she said.

He nodded. 'You could see everything that could happen. Every possibility. It burned your mind, Rose. I think that's what she meant. Over time, you'll become more and more like that, seeing timelines and possibilities and impossibilities until they're there all the time, burning through your mind. I think that's how you'll die.'

'I… know,' she said, her gaze focused somewhere in the middle of the time rotor.

He stared at her a moment before continuing. 'I think a connection with my mind, with everything inside it, could speed the process along.' He paused. 'I could lose you.'

'No.'

'No? What d'you mean 'no'?' he asked, annoyed at her flat denial.

'I can feel you,' she said slowly, as though working it out as she went along. 'I can feel you right now, in my head.'

'Only a murmur, you said.'

'Red grass and silver trees,' she said, closing her eyes. 'But we've never been anywhere like that. Not you an' me. There's a house built into the mountainside.' Her eyes snapped open. 'I can feel you, Doctor. I can see your mind.'

'And I can't sense you at all,' he murmured. 'Not like that.'

She slipped from the jumpseat and stood in front of him again. 'How about now?'

\/\/


	11. Chapter 11

_Author's Note: Sorry it's been so long between updates. I've been beta reading MickeyTheOwl's sequel to Burning up a Sun and Loose Ends - An Unearthly Child..._ _Thank you once again to everyone who has read, reviewed and favourited... I will hopefully be able to respond to reviews this weekend xx_

* * *

The Doctor blinked, taking a deep breath. Rose was standing in front of him, so close he could feel the warmth radiating off her. But nothing else. No telltale tingle in the back of his mind.

He realised she was waiting for a response. 'No,' he murmured. 'Nothi-' He broke off as he staggered backwards, suddenly awash with sensation. Rose was _everywhere_. An all-encompassing golden furnace. Too bright. Too hot. Too _much_.

Just as it was becoming unbearable, threatening to burn him clean away, it stopped. He felt a murmur of discontent bubbling up in his throat he realised she wasn't gone. Just quiet. He realised he'd closed his eyes and opened them wide, staring at her.

She was completely still. His gaze darted over her face, seeing her intense concentration described in her tightly closed eyes, her lower lip caught between her teeth. Suddenly he was struck by the image of the two of them in this exact spot.

Well… part of his brain amended, almost. Slightly to the left, actually.

Regardless, before Rassilon and Gallifrey and Wilf, when he'd believed he'd been about to die, he'd taken hold of her in this room. Pressed his mind into hers as he pressed her into the console. And he hadn't been afraid. Quite suddenly he'd not been afraid at all.

The realisation came in a split second and then he was pulling her against himself, his fingers sliding into her hair and guiding her face towards his. Slumped as he was against the console, the angle was strange - different - and it didn't help his concentration when gold light flared behind his eyes.

He wanted this. He could feel the desire, the need burning through him as her nails scraped against his scalp, making him shiver. But this wasn't meant for him. He'd kept himself back all this time because he knew that. Killer of his own kind. He couldn't allow her to bind herself to that. He broke away from the kiss with a gasp. 'This isn't going to work, Rose.'

Abruptly, the golden glow in his mind was gone.

'Ok,' she said, backing away from him. 'So let's try somethin' completely new, yeah?'

'You're angry,' he remarked, crossing his arms and regarding her warily.

'I mean it, Doctor. Somethin' completely _out there_.'

'What?'

'You actually _listen _for a change!' she snapped.

'I listen,' he said, aware that he was being aggressively reasonable.

'You need me!' she said, throwing the words at him as though afraid he'd duck them.

He nodded. 'That's why this worries me.' She shook her head impatiently. 'What?'

'You need me to stop you,' she said, unconsciously reinforcing something Donna had said to him years ago. He looked down, eyes tracking over the scuffmarks on his trainers rather than look at her face. 'What happens next time someone offers you everythin' you've ever wanted and the universe depends on you turnin' it down, Doctor?'

He looked up at her and watched her expression soften, presumably in reaction to the look in his eyes. 'What if that's what's happening right now?' he asked quietly. 'What if that's what this is?'

'That's not what I mean and you know it,' she said, eyes glittering. She began to pace in front of the jumpseat.

He recognised her restlessness as something she'd gotten from him. That need to move when words weren't enough. Couldn't be enough. 'Rose-' he began tiredly, running a hand over his face.

'What about the next time Gallifrey turns up in the sky?' she demanded.

'That's not-'

'Or the Ood decide they want a word?'

'_Rose_.'

'Or the Daleks-'

'Rose!' he snapped.

She stopped pacing and looked up at him. 'What?'

'I'm not human. You said it yourself, I have to make decisions almost every day that effect everyone, not just us. It'll never be just you and me.'

'I know that. I've always known that. I can feel it,' she said quietly, not quite meeting his gaze. 'The Oncoming Storm. I can feel it in your head. S'like being at the centre of a tornado or somethin'. Seein' everything going on around me and knowing I'm safe.'

'I can make those decisions because I have a _lot_ of practice. Centuries of practice, Rose. Centuries and centuries. And I don't always get it right. I make so many mistakes and there's always a cost.' He sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck and glancing wildly around the console room as though expecting it to provide the answers. 'On Satellite Five you had the powers of a god, but you couldn't cope with it. You saved me and killed the Daleks, not because it was the right thing to do, but because you love me.'

'You don't trust me,' she said. Her voice was breathless, as though she'd been winded. She fell back into the jumpseat, staring down at the grating at his feet.

'It's not that,' he assured her, wishing she'd look up at him. 'Never think that. I trust you. I'm just…'

'I would have stopped you,' she said. 'I would have done whatever it took to stop you. If I had to.' She looked up at him, her eyes burning with unshed tears. 'I would have killed them, Doctor. Even if it meant losing you. Even if it meant sending you with them.'

She stood, moving back over to him and coming to a stop just centimetres away. 'I know you want this,' she said softly. 'Can feel it.'

'I can't-' he began, his tone mirroring hers.

'Yes, you can,' she murmured.

She wasn't moving, wasn't even touching him, but he could feel himself leaning closer to her. 'It could destroy you,' he murmured. 'I could destroy you.'

'You won't,' she said, her tone brooking no argument.

'Humans aren't meant for this kind of bond, Rose.' He said, dropping his head so his forehead was resting against hers.

'Lucky I'm not just human then, isn't it?' she shot back, tilting her head back and kissing him.

As she ran her tongue over his bottom lip, the Doctor moved forwards, catching her around the waist and walking her backwards until her legs hit the jumpseat and she fell onto it. The Doctor caught himself with one hand on the seat, trapping Rose beneath him.

'If I do this, if I finish what was started properly – there's no going back on that, Rose.'

''s gonna be a long few centuries if you don't, Doctor,' Rose said, still looking slightly dazed.

'Could be dangerous,' he said, keeping his voice low as he dropped his head and began pressing kisses to her throat.

'You've said,' she replied dryly. 'I'll be fine,' she added, bringing her hands up between them and loosening his tie.

'I meant for me,' he said, allowing one of his hands to slip under her shirt while the other supported his weight. 'You were right. I need you.'

'I need you, too.'

He removed his free hand from under her shirt and ran it through her hair, staring down at her. He felt fractured, as though the warring parts of his psyche had torn him apart. He should be terrified at what he was considering. And he was. A part of him was utterly, utterly afraid.

Another part of him was annoyed that he and Rose had been forced into this. Although forced was probably too strong a word. Manipulated… tricked. Led.

Yet another part, fast taking the lead, was overwhelmed with desire for this. For her. Why not do this? This was Rose, who knew him better than anyone. Who could already sense what he was feeling. Who would stop him. Would always stop him and would always stay with him.

And he needed her. Needed her like he'd never needed anyone before her.

He straightened, pulling his tie from the collar of his shirt with a snap. 'Not here.'

She raised an eyebrow at him and pulled herself upright. He extended a hand, wiggling his fingers. Rose grinned up at him and took it, allowing him to pull her against himself. He moaned as she stood up on tiptoe to press her face into his neck. Golden light flared in his mind as his nerves began to burn.

'Not _here_, Rose,' he murmured, wanting to hate the pleading quality he heard in his own voice, but not quite managing it.

She didn't respond, merely flicked her tongue into the hollow of his throat.

'Rose!' he yelped. He cleared his throat. 'Honestly, too many people with a key to that door.'

She stood back, looking flushed and slightly breathless. He blinked to clear his head then looked down to where their hands were still joined. 'Come with me?'


	12. Chapter 12

Rose could feel the tension rolling through the Doctor in waves as he led her through the TARDIS corridors. His hand was gripping hers tightly and his stride was slightly too long, meaning she had to walk faster than was comfortable in order to keep up.

As they reached a door the Doctor paused and Rose realised what else was wrong. His hand was hot in hers. Concerned, she reached up and laid the back of her hand against his cheek. 'You're burning up!'

He shook his head, blinking as though to clear his eyes. He reached beyond her and laid his hand against the door. 'Put your hand here,' he said, his voice hoarse.

Rose reached up and pressed her hand to the door beside the Doctor's. After a second the door slid away, revealing a dark room beyond.

'Thought we were goin' to our room,' Rose murmured as he let go of her hand and stepped into the room. She followed him, staring around herself. As the door slid closed it blocked the light from the corridor, leaving them in complete darkness. 'Doctor?' she called, stretching her hands out ahead of her and stepping further into the room.

The words appeared in her mind without bothering to travel through the air first. _Find me_.

'Does it have to be so dark?' she asked aloud.

_You're not naturally telepathic. The dark will help. Find me._

'Yeah. How am I doin' that again?' she said, allowing her annoyance to colour her tone.

_Rose…_

Her name was like a whisper on the back of her neck. And suddenly she was back on the parallel Earth, waking up with the Doctor's voice in her head, compelling her towards a beach in Norway. She could do this.

She took a deep breath and concentrated. The room was absolutely dark, and he was clearly making an effort not to move at all and give himself away. There was nothing, not even the sound of his breathing, to tell her he was in the room with her.

_Don't be afraid. You trust me, don't you?_

She could feel his concern for her, bleeding through the words he was putting in her head. 'Can you see me?'

She felt rather than saw the lascivious grin that overtook his features. _Sort of, yeah. In the console room, you could feel me and I couldn't feel you. You need to reach for me with your mind._

'I don't know what I'm doing!' she protested.

_When has that ever stopped you?_

She rolled her eyes in the dark. 'This is a test, yeah? Put me in a dark room and ask me to find you. See if I'm good enough for all this?'

_This is to protect you._

'From what?' When no answer came she turned slowly on the spot, peering into the darkness. 'Doctor? Protect me from what?'

Silence. Feeling a bit ridiculous, Rose closed her eyes and took a deep breath, searching for that poorly defined _feeling_ she associated with the Doctor. That pull she felt from him whenever they were in the same room.

Heat. She could feel heat over to her left. She tensed, ready to move towards it.

_Stay there._

_I don't wanna play this game anymore_. As she opened her mouth to say the words aloud, she realised he'd already heard. She concentrated on her next thought, trying to project it at him. _You're in my head._

_Yep._

She turned slowly and raised her hands, finding first the material of his suit jacket, then his heartbeats underneath. Touching him, assuring herself of his presence felt strange in the complete darkness that surrounded them. Secret. Heart thudding in her chest, she felt his breath hitch slightly as she began to slide her hands upwards, towards his face, until he caught both her wayward hands in one of his.

_Wait_.

_No._

_Rose-_

The Doctor was silenced abruptly as Rose tore her hands out of his grasp. He stepped away from her, back into the protection afforded by the darkness

_Don't. I'm already far too susceptible to you... Physically. We have to be careful._ The words came spilling out of his mind almost chaotically. _You were there when I regenerated._

'She said that,' Rose said, resorting to speaking aloud again now that she'd lost her sense of him.

'It's more than that,' he murmured, speaking finally, his voice low. 'After satellite five I regenerated because of you. _For_ you. I died to save you, Rose and I was reborn looking at you. I love you. The dark is to protect you from me. To stop me forcing the link.'

'Why would you do that?' she asked, trying to work out where he was now. His voice seemed to be coming from several different places

'I want you. This isn't something I've considered before.'

He must be circling her, she realised, the thought sending a shiver up her spine. Her brain prompted her to respond to his last sentence. 'What? Not ever?'

'Never ever. Human relationships, human feelings are so transitory, Rose, and I'm not sure I can-'

He was cut off by a flare of gold, and Rose's voice, Rose's _words_, tumbling over one another.

_I made my choice a long time ago. Because he's calling. Even if he is how could I leave him? I'd give anything... I'd do anything._

As the glare faded from her mind, Rose spoke into the darkness, turning in a circle to try and find him. 'So first I won't last long enough to make this worth it, now my feelings won't?'

'That's not… I never said-'

'You did.' She sighed and stopped turning. 'You said you wanted me, needed me. That you love me.'

There was the barest hesitation before he spoke. 'I do.'

'Then what-'

'What happened to Donna,' he said suddenly. 'It could happen to you. And I'll never be able to do what I did for her. I won't be able to save you because I can't stand the idea that you won't remember me.'

'I'll never want you to,' she said, her voice just as soft as his had been. She reached out in the darkness suddenly and miraculously felt her hand brush against his. She threaded her fingers through his, the familiar gesture made strange by the warmth of his hand.


	13. Chapter 13

_Author's Note: Another relatively short chapter here... sorry. The next chapter should be the last._

* * *

Time lords weren't especially physical. He wondered briefly if Rose knew how many taboos they'd broken _before_ the Battle of Canary Wharf, let alone after she'd returned.

He hadn't really thought about it himself until he was standing in a room mostly populated by Time Lords, feeling their shock reverberate around the room as he pulled her against himself kissed her. Felt their displeasure and their... Curiosity? No… not quite curiosity, but definitely not the dignified disinterest and disdain they should have been feeling.

He took a deep breath, forcing his ruminations on the lack of their expected response to the back of his mind. Rose's fingers tightened on his own and he became aware of her heavy breathing, her increased pulse rate, just inches from him in the dark.

When he'd said he could see her, he hadn't been entirely truthful. He could _feel_ her. Knew where she was because his mind found it almost ridiculously easy to focus on her now he was allowing it to do so.

'Will it hurt?' Rose asked suddenly.

'Possibly. Do you want to stop?'

'No,' she responded simply.

He moved until he was standing in front of her, releasing her hand and raising his fingertips to her temples in a gesture she was familiar with. It wasn't strictly necessary, but he wanted her to feel comfortable.

'I need you to think of somewhere safe, Rose,' he said, keeping his voice low in order to imbue it with some semblance of control. 'I need you to form a very strong picture in your mind, as though you're there.

'You ok?' She asked. He felt her concern at his tone wash through him.

'I'm fine,' he assured her, managing to steady his voice.

He felt her state of mind shift slightly and knew before he opened his eyes what he'd see. He opened them anyway, to check he was correct. 'The console room?'

She shrugged, looking around. 'You said somewhere safe.'

'I meant somewhere… different. Somewhere I wouldn't know. I need to know the link is strong enough.'

Realisation dawned on her features. 'An' you could be fillin' in the details if you know the place?' He nodded. 'Wouldn't you know?' she asked.

He shrugged, unwilling to admit just how much she was overwhelming him. He was just relieved to find he wasn't burning, at this point. That he still had enough control to keep her at arm's length.

'Ok,' she muttered. 'Somewhere safe, that you wouldn't know.'

He sensed a flash of amusement moving through her, as though he'd inadvertently tickled her. 'What?' he asked, feeling his own lips quirking into a half smile in response.

''s just… I can't think of anywhere you wouldn't know. That we haven't been together.'

He grinned, making a pleased sound in the back of his throat before he could stop himself.

'Shut up,' she murmured.

'Sorry.'

'Right.'

The scene shifted. They were…

'Torchwood?' he asked, his voice jumping an octave in surprise. He cleared his throat, turning around in slow circle. This wasn't Torchwood in this universe. It was the Torchwood of Pete's world.

Half-finished bits of kit lined the room. He looked around with interest before realising that Rose wasn't beside him. 'Rose?'

'Over here.'

He turned towards the sound of her voice, finally locating her at the far side of the room, standing with her hand resting against a white wall. _That_ white wall. He moved until he was at her side.

'This place?' he asked, quirking an eyebrow at her.

She nodded. 'Used to come here,' she said, 'when I was trying to get back. I felt like… like I was closer to home here.'

He held her gaze a moment before speaking softly. 'Well… we know you can pull me into your mind.'

She nodded. 'What now?'

'Now? Now you need to come with me.' He reached out and took her hand.

Rose blinked and reached out to steady herself as the room shifted around her, became her mother's old flat on the Powell estate.

Looking around, she saw the Doctor was on the sofa, apparently watching television with her mother. The TARDIS was parked in the kitchen and Rose realised this must be just after they'd left Mickey in the parallel world. The Doctor had originally landed the TARDIS in her mother's living room, but had moved it to the kitchen after a few too many barbed comments about Jackie's inability to see the television through it.

'Right,' Jackie said, rising and stretching. 'I'm off to bed. Make sure you turn everythin' off before you head back in there,' she said, nodding in the direction of the TARDIS. 'And no spiritin' my daughter away in the night. I'm makin' the pair of you a proper English breakfast in the mornin'. _No arguments_.'

'Actually,' the Doctor on the sofa said, not looking up from the television. 'Thought I might stay out here tonight. Make sure everything's ok and... everything.'

Jackie looked at him fondly for a moment before her features schooled themselves into her normal expression of mild distrust and suspicion. 'Right. Blanket's in the airing cupboard. I'll fetch it.'

The Doctor looked up, shocked at this display of kindness. 'Oh, I really don't need-' he began, but Jackie had already gone. When she returned she dumped the folded blanket into the Doctor's lap. 'There.' She turned to leave and the Doctor's eyes returned to the television screen. 'Thanks,' Jackie said, stopping in the doorway and turning to look at him.

The Doctor looked over at her. 'For what?' he asked quietly.

'For bringin' her home,' Jackie said simply.

'I'll always bring her home,' the Doctor responded. 'I promise.'

They held one another's gaze for a moment, unspoken communication filling the small room, then Jackie nodded. 'Night, Doctor.'

As Rose watched the scene shifted dramatically. They were now in her bedroom at her mother's flat. She was asleep on the bed, one arm tucked under her head. The Doctor was standing over her, hands shoved deep into his pockets as he watched her sleep, an unfathomable expression on his face.

He sucked in a deep breath then carefully sat on the edge of her bed, seeking out her hand and threading his fingers through hers. Rose watched as she shifted in her sleep, unconsciously curling her body around his.

Suddenly she was standing in the darkness of the TARDIS again, the Doctor's hands framing her face.

'I thought we had to go somewhere I didn't know?' she said.

'Well… somewhere, somewhen… same difference. You were asleep. Never knew I was there.'

'Hmm…' Rose said, remembering the way she'd wrapped herself around him. 'What now?'

'Now?' he asked, so close in the dark his breath ghosted over her face.

'Why were you in my room?' she asked.

'You know why.'

'Tell me.'

He hesitated, and then ploughed ahead with the explanation, his words stumbling over one another. 'We'd just come back from Pete's world. The first time. And I… I was so worried about you. I was afraid you'd want to stay with your mother, that you'd had enough.'

'Show me more things I don't know about.'

He chuckled. 'Rose, I'm nine hundred and seven… there's a lot you don't know.'

'Just the highlights then?' she asked, leaning into him and stretching up on tiptoe, pressing her lips to his.

He moaned and thrust his hands into her hair, holding her in place as they were flooded with brilliant light.


	14. Chapter 14

_Author's Note: The final chapter! Thank you so much to everyone who has read, reviewed or favourited... it means the world to me!_

* * *

It was too much. It was everything. All at once. And it was possibly the most full his head had ever felt.

Unable to control it, Rose's life was pouring through his mind as she pressed herself against him.

He was standing in Torchwood three. The hub was deserted except for Rose. She was sitting at Jack's desk, idly leafing through some of the captain's papers. She glanced up as the monitor in front of her flickered to life. Her eyes widened slightly, then her mouth set into a line. She stood, turning on her heel and heading towards the armoury.

Quickly, needing to move before the memory faded, the Doctor made his way around the desk until he could see the monitor. He was unsurprised at what he saw. Two words filled the screen, repeated over and over. The same words he'd seen all over the marketplace after Donna had whispered the message to him.

_Bad Wolf._

'You are the Bad Wolf, but this is a gift that must be paid for.'

The Doctor blinked. He was in Rose's mind again, watching her converse with the Time Lady.

'What's the price?' Rose asked, her jaw set in a determined line.

The Time Lady regarded Rose seriously. 'The same as the gift.' She held Rose's gaze for a moment before continuing. 'You.'

Rose looked puzzled. 'I what?'

'You are both the gift, and the price, Rose Tyler.'

He felt realisation blossom in Rose's mind. 'I get it,' she said softly. 'The gift is for the Doctor, and the price is what it'll cost him.'

'And both are you.' The woman regarded Rose for a moment. 'Do you want to change your mind? No one would think less of you.'

'No.'

'Then let us begin.' The woman stepped forwards, reaching for Rose's hands.

The Doctor was burning. Burning, burning, burning. But the sensation didn't belong to him. This was Rose, burning herself into time to stay with him He had no idea how much time had passed but he was suddenly able to see again. Rose was stumbling away from the Time Lady in her mind, her hand instructively going to her forehead.

'What now?' she asked, glancing up at the other woman.

The Time Lady smiled as though Rose had passed some sort of a test. The Doctor felt Rose's annoyance at the continued appearance of that smile and had to bite down on his amusement.

'The Doctor must complete the change,' the woman said quickly, sounding worried. 'He must initiate a bonding with you.' Rose nodded, still feeling slightly out of it. 'You must convince him. At present he is far from certain of what to do for the best. And once it is done, you must tell him. He will worry over every decision if you do not do so.'

'Tell him what?'

'That you would die to save him.'

Rose snorted her amusement at that. 'He knows.'

'And that you would sacrifice even him, should you have to.'

Rose met the other woman's eyes and held her gaze for a long moment. Then she gave a short nod.

The woman smiled. 'Time and her Lord.'

'I'm not-'

'But you are. For now.'

'You're 'sposed to be showin' me things I don't know about.'

Rose's words, spoken in the darkness of the TARDIS, caused the Doctor to open his eyes. He still couldn't see, but at least his mind was clear on where they were. Rather than answer her, he pulled her closer, kissing her again, willing his mind to stay in the present.

When they broke apart, Rose asked, 'Why couldn't I see you?'

'You weren't looking,' he whispered back. 'The stronger the memory, the harder it is to step out of, to be the you _now_, rather than the you _then_.'

'Oh,' she said, and he felt her nodding in the darkness as he pulled her against himself, needing to _feel_ her body there, if he couldn't see her.

'Would you do it?' he asked, his lips brushing against her hair as he spoke.

'Would I what?' she asked.

'What she said.'

As soon as the words left his mouth, he felt it. Her utter terror at the thought that she'd have to sacrifice him to save her world. Her universe. At the knowledge that she would do it. That she _could_.

He'd said it to her once himself, although he'd felt it many more times, both before and since. _I could save the world but lose you. _

Rose was appalled at the thought of it, but Commander Tyler knew it was necessary. Just as the little boy from Gallifrey had been terrified of what he was doing even as the Doctor brought about the end of the Time War.

As brief as it was, and as much as he tried to tamp it down, the stray thought about the Time War drew Rose in, dragged her to a place in his memory he would never have had her go.

Rose stared around herself. She was in the console room, but not as she knew it. It was… grander, somehow. Gothic. Suddenly the whole TARDIS shuddered and she had to reach for the console to keep to her feet.

The doors opened and a man fell through them, coughing violently and stumbling towards the console. He fell, and lay sprawled on the decking, his body heaving with the effort of drawing breath. Instinctively, Rose made to walk towards him, but stopped short as the time rotor began to oscillate.

The man looked up at the console, horror written across his features. She didn't recognise him, not physically, but she could feel herself being drawn to him. Even had they not been in his mind, she would have known him anywhere. Her Doctor. Now he was closer, Rose could see he was bleeding, blood flowing from a deep gash on his forehead.

'No! No, no, no,' he was saying, his voice desperate. 'I didn't… We're staying here! We have to stay here!'

He dragged himself upright and staggered over to the console, reaching for the controls. 'I'm dying. We're dying. And we're staying here! Let this be an end to it.'

As if in answer, the console sparked viciously, forcing him backwards. The doors swung shut and Rose felt the slight disorientation that came with dematerialisation.

'I've killed them,' the Doctor was whispering furiously from where he'd fallen to the deck. 'I've killed them all. And I want to stay!'

'But you can't.' The words were torn from her before she could stop them. But this was a memory, wasn't it? She couldn't change it, but she _could_ stop him feeling it so intensely. She had to.

His head snapped up, looking for the source of the voice that shouldn't - couldn't - be there. 'Who's there?' He demanded, the effort of making himself heard over the really quite worrying sounds the TARDIS was making inducing another coughing fit. When he pulled the handkerchief away from his mouth it was spotted with blood.

Memory or not, this was the Doctor and he needed her. Rose stepped forwards, coming to crouch at his side as the TARDIS shuddered again. 'It's ok.'

'You can't - who are you?' He asked, seeming to focus on her with no small amount of effort. 'What are you?'

'I'm your… friend.'

'You're more than a friend,' he murmured fervently.

She blinked, unsure how to respond. He shouldn't be able to know her, not locked in to this memory as he was. 'Yeah.'

'Why are you here?' He began to cough again as behind him a large part of the console room crumbled to the deck, revealing the coral underneath.

'I'm not,' Rose said. 'Neither are you. We're in your head. This is just a memory.'

'Really? Hurts like its happening.'

'I know. I'm sorry. This is my fault. I just wanted to see…'

A bell tolled from deep within the TARDIS.

'Doctor?' she asked, afraid she knew what that sounds meant.

'Gallifrey's gone,' he said quietly. 'I killed them all.'

'You saved the universe,' Rose said firmly. He stared at her, his eyes barely focusing. 'And you saved them. I saw what they wanted – what they would have become - and you saved them from it. You-' she stopped, staring at him as his skin began to glow. 'You're dying.'

'For the last time.'

'What?'

'I won't regenerate. I can't.' He rolled onto his back, closing his eyes.

'You have to! I know you – future you. You have to regenerate!'

'If I regenerate now I'll be a monster.'

'No, you won't. You'll be the Doctor.'

'I'll be the last...' he hissed.

He was gone. And Rose was suddenly in the console room as she knew it, the Doctor pressing her into the console. She blinked furiously, unsure whether this was his memory or hers. His fingertips slid to her temples, pouring his mind into hers, and she was suddenly aware of everything he'd felt.

She felt sick to her stomach. He'd been so far from all right for months. And she'd _known_. Known there was something wrong. But this feeling of sickening terror combined with dull resignation was almost horrific. On top of it all, she could feel the temptation to just change things. To _make things better_.

She'd not been able to meet his eyes for days after Bowie Base One and Adelaide Blake. Afraid she'd see _him _there. The Time Lord Victorious standing in the Doctor's clothes and shoes. Wearing the Doctor's face.

Her avoidance of him had been somewhat responsible for keeping him in check, she saw now. He was just as afraid of what she'd see when she looked at him.

But he'd been able to hide the extent of his fear from her then. That wouldn't be possible now. Everything he thought, everything he felt, everything he _was… _all of it was exposed now.

_No_. The Doctor's voice sounded in her head as she was returned to the safety of the darkened room.

_What?_

_You're wondering if that's why I was reluctant to do this. The answer's no._

_Oh. Ok. Why, then?_

_Because of everything you saw. The Time War… you shouldn't have to see that. Feel that._

'Neither should you,' she said aloud, reaching up with one hand to pull his face down to hers.

As she tugged his shirt loose from his trousers and slid a hand under it he moaned, stepping backwards and pulling her with him. His legs hit something soft and folded, leaving him lying full length on what seemed to be a bed with Rose sprawled on top of him. He dragged Rose's shirt over her head, hearing buttons snap off and disappear into the darkness. He rolled them until he was holding himself above her, one hand tracking up her body to her face.

_Are you sure?_

She hooked her legs around his then, rolling them so he was pinned beneath her once more. Then there was just the burning golden light, drawing him in.

\/\/

He could feel her, just there in the dark. They were lying side by side now, only their hands touching. He was slowly becoming aware that he hadn't managed to get his shirt all the way off, and that partially worn shirts could be uncomfortable.

'Take it off,' Rose said into the darkness.

He smirked at that and pushed himself upwards, dragging the shirt off and dropping it over the side of the bed to join the rest of their clothes.

'Wilf met her,' Rose murmured, turning her body so she was curled into his side. 'Said she kept appearing to him, when he was looking for you before the Master showed up. A call to arms, he called it. Like she was preparing him for what was gonna happen.'

'When did he tell you that?' the Doctor asked, turning on to his side and looking down to where he knew her face was, even though he still couldn't see.

'When you and Jack were arguin' about the TARDIS.'

'We weren't arguing. You can't argue with someone who has no idea what they're talking about, Rose.'

After a few moments he felt her breathing even out, her mind become a gentle buzz in the background of his own.

She was asleep. No sense waking her. Whatever happened would happen. He closed his eyes, feeling exhaustion burning through him.

'Would it have made a difference?' the Time Lady stood on the hillside, as she had the last time he'd seen her outside her official capacity.

The Doctor looked down at himself. Strange to see himself so much younger, but looking so much older.

'Had you not been granted this extra time with her, would you miss her any less once she was gone?' the Time Lady pressed. Without waiting for his answer, she continued, 'Answer me this, Doctor. Having not had this with her, were you less affected when she was trapped in a parallel universe? She will burn herself into Time for you. And she will return to it, when she can't go on any longer.'

His eyes snapped open. It too him a moment to realise the room was now bathed in a sot light. Not their room. A new room. A new room designed for what they'd needed tonight. The TARDIS was too clever by half.

She shifted slightly, her leg sliding over his, and he felt renewed desire skitter up his spine. Felt it mirrored in her. He should get up. Leave her to rest.

_The weight of you could kill her._

The Master's words, cold and hard and full of fear, hit him like a lead weight dropped from a great height. 'Rose…' he murmured.

She didn't respond, was too deeply asleep to do so. He shifted slightly; needing to see her now there was light. He allowed his eyes to track over her features, seeking out difference and finding none. The golden goddess he felt in his mind bore Rose's face. Would do so for a long time.

And she wouldn't burn, he resolved. Not so long as he drew breath. His "_mother"_ could say what she liked. So could the Master. What did they know? He was the Doctor and she was Rose and he loved her, so she would not burn. Simple.

Feeling satisfied with that, he closed his eyes, drifting into a dreamless sleep.


End file.
